Chopped off a chunk of my finger tip last night, it is hard to type, will check back in with you all when I am a little more healed.

NSV

Tonight after work as I was driving home with a raging sinus headache I decided to stop at Mcdonalds and pick up dinner. I knew that it was going to be way too many points, filled with yucky fat, and would make me feel sluggish and sick afterwards. I didn't care, I was cranky, tired,and in pain.

F-that I snapped out of it just in time to turn in to subway and picked up sandwiches for the hubby and I. It was healthier, cheaper, and I feel very content after eating it. Woo how far I have come. I made a better choice not only for myself but for my husband too.

PS the sodium from eating out this weekend has gone away and my weight seems a bit more friendly as of this morning.

Mini goal

My mini goal this week is to stop all the BLTs. NO more grabbing a handful of raisins or a piece of candy at work. It is not worth it, to count or especially to not count. I am going to attempt to write everything that I eat before I eat it.

Snow day

Today is a SNOWDAY!! Yay! So I got to sleep in and relax all morning which was lovely! I cleaned up the apartment this weekend so I have no housekeeping to do either!! I am going to work on some homework today to get ahead for the week. What a great way to start the week prepared and ready.

I do need to get some produce tomorrow to keep up on my veggies. I ate my last sweet potato last night oh my yum! I had no idea that I would enjoy them as much as I do. When I first started eating them I really didnt care for them, I was a little freaked out about the sweetness in a veggie. It took me 2 or 3 times to really start to enjoy them, I have found that they are more tasty if I let them cool a bit before eating them. <- wow that was a little off topic. Anyways I do need to make a produce stop.

I also need to look at my meals plans for the week and figure out some menus. I know that I have a birthday dinner at Margaritas (yes again) on Saturday night to keep in mind. Last week I planned ahead and earned a lot of activity points to balance out my meals out which obviously didn't work for me. SO instead this week I will just try very hard not to eat any more of my 35 weekly points (I have already used 5) so that I can have them as a backup.

Since this past week I have just been insatiably hungry, I want to eat all the time. Nothing too bad, its not like cravings but rather just a desire to eat. I have tried eating popcorn as a mindless munching food but it isn't working. I have been downing water like nobodys business the past couple days and still I am dying to eat. I am not sure what I am going to do. There arent any 0 point veggies that I like but maybe I should try some filling foods and use the set points.

I am so worried that I will not lose anything again this week, it is just not fair. I am staying within my points! Not eating everything I want, eating healthy, and working out....what is it that I am doing wrong? Two weeks of gaining is just too much I must lose next week or I will probably cry on the scale.

Just a note

I really really didn't want to weigh in this morning. NOt because I went over my points because I didn't. I just had that feeling of not wanting to spoil my forward momentum. I also knew that not weighing in wouldn't change the numbers, so I did it anyways.

Sometimes I think about not wanting to weigh in and just living a healthy life. I have tried this before and it doesn't work out for me. I know that. I will face my weigh ins with the pride of knowing that I had a week of good eating or exercise. I will acknowledge my mistakes and move forward because backwards is not a choice. I will keep my weight watcher membership because even when I fall I know that each day is a new day, of new choices, and new victories. I will not quit on myself because I am soo much more than a number on the scale.

Up 2.4lbs this week, don't want to deal with or talk about it. I am pretending it didn't happen so that I can just move on. I earned 17 activity points this week, I will celebrate that instead. I ate out 3 times but counted every calorie, I failed on my water intake and I paid. I am not disappointed and as much as it sucked I'm not worried about it.

Going to drink a diet coke....I mean water.. but really a diet coke now.

I thought about weighing in early today so that I could sleep in tomorrow but with the first glace at my home scale decided ..no. It said I was up 2+ pounds. It made me a little sad. I mean I have worked up 17 activity points that I haven't eaten ..yet. I am within my points and I ate all my flex as of yesterday. I am really just hoping that it is the sodium from dinner last night. I will weigh in tomorrow morning and see if those 2 disappear.

I am also going out to dinner tonight at Margaritas, a grilled chicken salad for me and a melon margarita too. I am going to work on my water intake today to flush out some sodium and clean my house for a little light activity.

A clean house can really work wonders for my mental health, it helps me be overall more productive and positive. Add to that a clean fridge and it is amazing how much more appetizing cooking and veggies look. Clutter really makes me crazy, even though I don't notice that it is making me crazy until it is gone. Clear counters, table tops, and floors I cannot wait!

I hate being a woman

All I want to do is eat. I am feeling constantly hungry the past two days (damn period) and I a blowing through points like no bodies business. Normally I would just use my flex during the week and avoid eating out on the weekend to compensate but I have two dinners out already planned! Both dinners are with family and I have no call on the location of the first one on Friday because they are visiting so they get to choose. And if I know my family they wont even decide until 10 minutes before we go! Ah.

It is making me feel quite uneasy to say the least. The second dinner on Saturday night we are going to Margaritas and I know that I can order a grilled chicken salad which will be ok. I will also probably want a margarita but just one. By the way the salad that I am having comes in one of those large taco shells any idea on the points in that. Not that I will eat the whole thing but to be honest it is quite yummy so I will eat some of it. I have to be realistic about what will happen so it helps to know the damage before hand.

I have 15 weekly points left and 6 activity points banked. I am planning on an hour on the treadmill tonight so that is an additional 4 activity points. I will also be heading to my family's hotel for some swimming with my little brothers tomorrow and maybe Friday too. SO overall I am trying to combat my appetite with activity. I really just want to not feel hungry but I really want to lose weight this week. I want to hit those 170s so badly.

Weigh etc

SO I was up .2 on Monday morning, no biggie after all the vday chocolate. I'm not sure what is up with my weight not being listed on the BLBE challenge because I am sending them in. I emailed Angie and I will see what she says. I think it is a conflict over my weigh in day being Sunday and the reporting being on Sunday so I am thinking of weighing on Sunday still but reporting on Monday. I just want my team to know that I am trying hard and doing my part.

Beyond all that I got my monthly curse this morning, I woke up in pain! So today has been rough to say the least. I had to be at work an hour early to top it off! Oh well. Tomorrow is an early day again but that also means that I will be out early to enjoy the rest of my day. I have a bunch of homework to get down so that I can enjoy my weekend so hopefully I can bring myself to work on that tomorrow.

Take care!!

I should be on my way to weigh in.

Well, I woke up this morning with a headache and I am feeling pretty tired so I won't be going to weigh in. That's ok I thought that I might wait until Monday morning anyways. I was worried that I would be a little sodium laden from the pizza yesterday but I weighed myself at home this morning and I am right around the usual. Hopefully tomorrow I will be down a little.

Speaking of the pizza yesterday, I feel pretty good about it. I had three slices, felt really content, and stopped. I also had a few chocolates which were Yum-tastic! I had the hubs put the rest of the pizza slices together in one box with his yucky onion pizza so that I would be tempted to eat it this morning.

I know that yesterday put me a little over my points for the week but I really feel good about how I handled it. There was nothing that I ate that I didn't take the time to enjoy and at no point did I feel stuffed. On the other hand I could have planned to save my flex points for the wekend to make sure I was all covered but it just didn't work out that way. I ended up eating on campus a lot and that really wastes a lot of points.

Tomorrow morning I will weigh in, buy some healthy groceries, and enjoy yet another day off!!

Shopping day.

I went out shopping a bit today, picked up a new hoodie from American Eagle and noticed that I finally feel comfortable in that store now. I used to think that people were wondering how I would even fit in the clothes there even though I did fit into the xl. I actually bought a large today and it fit really nicely. It is great to be able to see my curves starting to show more and to feel like I have a waist. Ten pounds down makes such a big difference, I cannot wait to see what 20 lbs down looks like!

I also made a motivating purchase, a new ipod shuffle PINK. I already have a ipod touch but I wanted something that I could clip to my shirt and go. I will be able to use it on the treadmill without fear of it falling and breaking. SO thats very exciting!

ON the food front I know I could be doing better but its ok. I am enjoying what I eat today and taking time to listen to my body. I have few weekly points left and I know that dinner will probably be pretty sodium laden so I dont nessesarily expect a large loss Sunday. I may actually wait until Monday morning to weigh in or just weigh in and not look. It really such a mental thing for me.

I guess that brings us to my Valentines day plans, dont get too excited. We have a tradition of staying in, ordering pizza, and watching a movie. It was actually my idea on out first vaentines and I have never regretted it once. I would much rather stay in then go out into the crowds of people trying too hard to create this unobtainable ideal of the perfect date. I also tell my husband to not buy me flowers!! Imagine that, I love flowers! I tell him to wait until after vd to avoid the inflated prices.

Anyways no classes next week Yay break! I also have Monday and Friday off! It is going to be really nice to catch up and unwind a bit. There will most definitely be a haircut in my very near future, can't wait!

Tell me what you want what you really really want

What is with that title? I don't even know sometimes things pop into my head and well "that girl never had a thought that she didn't share." SOooooo anyways I am feeling really really tense lately and I think I need to get back into yoga again. The only porblem I have with yoga is that if I do it too soon after I eat I get really sick. With all the rush of my evenings it is hard to fit it in. I guess I will have to shuffle some things around and try to fit it in. Don't suggest morning.....I am so not a morning person not matter how hard I try!

Yay 5% gone.

I'm working on small obtainable goals as far as my weight loss goes so this week I hit 10lbs which is the goal I was aiming for, which is also 5% lost for me. My next small goal is to be in the 170's, Wooo here I come!

Usually I end up quiting ww around the 175lb point when I plateau but this time I am going to blow that away! 130's here I come!!

Am I hallucinating?

SO I got up this morning to head over to ww to weigh in and felt pretty sure that I was probably going to weigh in around the same as before or higher. I had excepted it and figured I would use it as a starting point for the week. I usually weigh myself at home before I go in order to not be too shocked at the number on the ww scale. My scale said that I was probably going to weigh in with a minor gain. I excepted it and moved on.

I get to ww and step on the scale and the weigher inner lady says ...2pounds good job. I'm like "oh I wasn't expecting that" shock set in then about 45 seconds later I said "a whole 2 pounds??" She says "yeah 2 even" minor brain delay on my part... "OH I got my ten pounds yay!" SO yeah that was quite the pleasent surprise this morning and just what I needed to fuel my excitement for the next week.

I need to slow down.

Wow it has been a long week! I really do apologize for not keeping up on my blog, it is not intentional. I am going to try harder next week but I am reading your blogs and trying to comment as much as I can! I think that school is stealing all my brain strength!

Ok on the food front I have been sticking to my points and choosing pretty healthy foods. I have had to eat lunches and dinners on campus a few times just because I some of the stuff I bought to lunches went bad really fast. I have been sticking to sandwiches because I feel like I can figure out the points more accuratly. When I could get off campus to grab something I grabbed subway so basically a lot of sandwiches this week.

We went to the olive garden last night for date night. I checked out the points for my meal online, I splurged on the lunch portion of the chicken alfredo (18points) one breadstick (3) and salad of course. I was able to stop at 1/2 of the pasta all of the grilled chicken in it. I had really filled up on salad before my food got there so that was good. I had enough points to cover everything so I feel ok about it.

I am babysitting tonight in a healthy house so that is good. I plan on getting a lot of my homework/studying done and working on my grocery list/food menus for the week.

Tomorrow morning I will weigh in, I am hoping to see a lower number but I'm not sure it will happen. It is really hard to understand why I am not losing even though I am eating my points. I guess next week I am try to not eat my flex 35 and see if that helps. I also need to incorporate more veggies this week. I think that I will try to be home more this week and not take any extra babysitting jobs so that I can focus on eating healthy and packing my lunches. The extra money is nice but I am just trying to do to much as once.

All right folks that I all I have for my week recap..see I told you there wasn't much going on besides school! Take care.

Avoiding?

Am I avoiding my blog? No. Am I incredibly busy in a boring everyday too much stuff to do so my blag gets neglected? Yes.

Weekly goals

Ok so last week was a bit of a bust, I checked my home scale it is telling me that I stayed around the same weight as last week. I kinda gave up towards the middle of the week so I am hoping to set a couple weekly goals to help me along this week. I am sticking to three because I want to be able to keep them in mind and if I get too many then I forget!

1. Start the day with a bottle of water (that's 20oz down by 9am)
2. Pack and eat my lunches each day
3. Don't eat the snacks at work unless it is fruit!

I am really focusing on how amazing I felt before school started when I was so ON plan. I felt great and I want to feel great again!! NO more sluggish, tired, or overstuffed Jess here. Beautiful Bridesmaid and I are both looking to lose 10lbs in February so it is on! We CAN do it!!

Not only is it a new day but also a new week. By the way it is also a new Month too!! Here is to February the month of the 10 lb weight loss right?