up up and....homework

Yes indeed I did get up at 6:45 this morning! I was at school working on an essay by 7:30 so much was accomplished in the time I would have spent sleeping!

As a bonus I was up at 1am with a vomiting husband to tend to and I still got up..Yeah I did think about using it as an excuse but I fought it. I am glad I did because I think that I would have just thrown in the towel because it is easier to sleep in.

SO far I am feeling ok, I did get a coffee asap this morning which helped a lot. Now I am eating lunch (weight watchers fresh meal mac an cheese, diet coke, and baked lays) and doing even more homework. SO I am off to be productive I hope you all are having a lovely day as well.

Silly Nerves

Why am I feeling nervous about getting up early tomorrow? It seems so silly to me, but its true. I can feel the butterflies in my stomach! Maybe it is also because I have a mini presentation tomorrow but I don't think so.

Am I afraid to fail? I can do this, I can be an early riser!! I need to stop self sabotaging and except this as something that I CAN do. So no more nerves, it is not the end of the world.

I'm UP! and dressed and my lunch is packed. SO today was a 6:45 sucess! It was really nice to open my email and see you guys checking up on me, it made it seem even more of a sucess! It is 7:15 I am usually just rolling myself out of bed right now, look at all I have done! YAY!

To be honest I have always had this quirky problem with waking up just before my alarm no matter what time it is set for so I was half awake at 6 thinking "ok, 45 more minutes" then at 6:15 "OK 30 more minutes" I think you can see the pattern. I probably should have just gotten up at 6 the first time I woke up!

So it is decided, tomorrow is the beginning of the 2 week get up earlier challenge. We are slowly working our way up to 6am. My husband gets up at 7:30 regularly and I usually get up at 7:15 (and some days at 9 when I dont have class until 10) so 6 is a challenge for us.

Tomorrow we will start at 6:45.
Mon 6:45
Tues 6:45
Wed 6:15
Thurs 6:15
Fri 6:15
Sat 7 (come on it is the weekend)
Sun 7
Mon 6:15
Tues 6
Wed 6

So hopefully this is how it goes!!
At first I will just get up and be awake but as soon at we get to 6/6:15 I am going to get on the treadmill for 30 minutes as soon as I get up. That will give me time to shower, blow dry my hair ect. because usually I shower at night to save time.

Not only will getting up earlier allow me more time I will also be able to get a workout in, pack a healthy lunch, and maybe even get ont eh breakfast bandwagon. I am tired of wasting my life in bed. I can get so much more accomplished in the morning this way!!

Eventually the weekends will probably be at 6am too but this was a concession to the husband. He is so not wanting to be on board with this! I only asked him to try for 2 weeks and then I am sure he will be back to sleeping in . I just think that I will need the support for the beginning of the habit.

Wish me luck, tomorrow morning is going to come fast!! BTW did I mention that I am back to school tomorrow after a weeks break ( I still worked though) so it will be a little more challenging that way too.

SO I weighed in this morning with a small gain, very small just a .2. Its cool I am attributing it to my glasses and Snot (allergies! hah).

I am switching my weigh in day to Saturday so that I can actually catch a meeting too. Before I was weighing in on Sunday morning and going to a meeting on Monday. However it was such a hassle to go back out at 7:30pm and go to the meeting so I have been skipping it. I truly think that that is a mistake. Meetings keep me committed to eating healthy.

I am also attemping to get up earlier in the morning so that I can get in my exercise in then. I have roped my husband into getting up with me for two weeks. I read somewhere that it takes 2 weeks to create a habit so that is my minimum time frame of attempting to get up early. Soo hopefully the hubs will keep me to it and not just let me roll over and go back to sleep!

I am not sure when I will start my early get up days, might be tomorrow, might be next week. We shall see. Wish me luck and any tips on how to make me get up or help it be less painful are very welcome!!

Well last night I babysat until 9:30 in a house filled with nothing to eat. I mean that there was food but nothing that went together or didn't require serious cooking. SO by the time I got out I was STARVING! I ended up picking up the hubs and heading out for dinner, oops. I used up all my points and maybe a little bit more.

Fast forward to right now. I ordered pizza and ate until I was satisfied which in itself is a victory on my part because I used to eat until I wanted to puke. I had 3 pieces of pizza. This leaves me with very few points for the rest of the day but you know I am ok with that. I will work with it.

I am really trying not to associate certain foods with guilt. Food shouldn't be a matter of guilt or glee, it should be fuel.

I know that eating healthier will make me feel more healthy and that eating junk will make me feel like junk. But sometimes you just want junk. If I am going to consume the junk either way then I want to be able to focus on it and enjoy it without the guilt.

On another note, I am not sure if I will officially weigh in tomorrow or not. I am leaning towards sleeping in a bit instead. So on to drinking some water and relaxing.

Down .6 not sure how that worked out. I think that I need to eat more than my points because the weeks that I go over 10-15 points I lose a little. SO maybe a point or so a day more than what weigh watchers says a day. I also am going to really try and focus on eating whole foods.

So down to 182, 3 more lbs and I will be in the 170s YAY!

And I ran I ran so far away..wait no I didn't

How many times Have I posted about wanting to be a runner? 3, 4, or 502? Not sure really but I still do. I keep trying, honestly I do but it always falls through. It gets too hard and I give up. Maybe I need to try something a little more gradual than C25K, maybe just alternate walking and running increasing a minute at a time each week? Not sure but I do know that I really really want to run. I desire running, I guess it is time to try again.

Next week is spring break for me so I will have a little more free time although I do have to work and take my teaching certification exam. I am also trying to get up a little earlier in the mornings working my way up to a 6am wake up. So far I have hit the snooze everyday and that is at 7am so I have a long way to go!

I want to be a early riser so that I can get my workout/run in in the morning setting up my day for success because after all I wouldn't want to undo all the lovely work I did. Maybe I will start with a morning walk, well we will see. I hope you all are doing well and have a great weekend!

So I weighed in this morning I was down .8 from my last weigh in two weeks ago. I am happy with that because no matter how small the loss it is moving in the right direction...it is going to be a good week.

Last week I choose to not eat out all week with the exception of subway as planned. I think it worked because I was able to feel good about my choices and I was in control over what went into my food.

I have gone and gotten some healthy groceries and I am trying to get ready for the week! I have already earned 4 activity points for an hour+ walk with the pup in the sunshine!! I am so glad spring seems to be arriving!

I am busy busy lately! I had to apply to grad school($50), sign up for my teaching certification exam Praxis I ($130 ouch), heal up my finger, doing my school work, got my period, and oh yeah work. so it has been beastly lately. Food is on track/exercise not happening. I am just taking life one step at a time, trying to relax.

Check me out!!

I love this Blog! Hey look it's me!

Not...a...good...day

I got asked the dreaded question today..by my professor who I meet with twice a week....who is my advisor....."Are you pregnant?" BITCH thats what I think of that.

Who asks that? Especially a woman, especially a psychologist who should know that the average female college student has serious body image issues in this society. How is it that people who are so book smart can act so ignorant?

Honestly I am hurt, I thought that I was doing well that maybe my weight loss was even noticeable to the unknowing eye. Wrong. She totally ruined my day as much as I tried to fight it. I feel like crap. Bonus, I have class with her tomorrow morning.

I'm sad.

Close

Soo close to the 170's I cannot wait!! I have been stuck at 183 for what seems like ages and I am so close to the 170s I want it so bad I feel like it is the push I need to go forward...170's here I come!

WAKE UP!

I woke up this morning knowing that I am getting back on track, not just eating whatever I want. It is hard to get out of the casualty of just grabbing something. I have only been eating freely for a couple days and already I am back in eat anything mode. Well that stops today.

I had a bowl of honey nut cheerios for breakfast with a large glass of ice water. I purchased good groceries yesterday and I am formulating a plan for the week. My goal for the week is to not eat out, if my friends want to go out for dinner I will eat at home and just enjoy a diet coke and their company.

The only exception to the no eating out is subway because with my school/work schedule sometime I am away from home for both lunch and dinner and I can only pack so much food from home. Plus, subway helps me get in lots of veggies.

So with no eating out I should be ok with staying in my points range.

someone need to get her crap together...

It's me. I'm working on it.


EDIT-
I want to feel the way I feel when I am doing it right. I want to feel strong, satisfied, and like I am moving in a positive direction. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.

Liar!

I lied. Originally yes I was eating with some healthfulness in mind and then well dinner happened. I went to Arbys and ordered all the stuff I usually NEVER even think about eating. We are talking a meal of mozzerella sticks, curly fries, and jalapeno poppers. It was ridiculous really. I didn't even truly enjoy it. What a WASTE. I feel ill.

Sometimes I think that this has to happen in order for me to move forward. You can only be stuck at the same plateau area for so long before you break. So now that is in the past and I am moving forward now, not Sunday as planned. It has already gone too far. Did I mention that I feel sick?

I just looked back at some before pictures of myself and have realized that even though I have only lost 10lbs my body has changed so much and I don't want to mess that up. I need to move forward in my weight loss and do what I need to do.

Tonight I am babysitting so I will catch up on some homework while the kiddies sleep and then make a good grocery list for the week. I need to find a lunchbox that fits in my backpack or is easy to carry something slim so that it is easy to carry around. I also think I want to splurge on one of those metal water bottles because they seem to keep the water nice and cold which is a must for me. Anyone have one? What do you think of it?

Sometimes you need to fall hard in order to really pick yourself up.

Life as I know it.

SO here is the deal I am a big huge baby when I am dealing with sickness or hurtness so I have beena bit of a slacky slackerson. My finger is healing well as far as I can tell and typing is coming along nicely as well. However having a giant bandaged finger is really tough when it comes to preparing food, washing my hair, buttoning my jeans, and writing. All in all I am doing ok though.

On Wednesday I went to dinner with friends and had a salad all was well but Thursday I had a little food break down and decided that I am going ot just relax for the rest of the week. No that doesn't mean eating mcdonalds 3 meals a day or putting in a chocolate IV, to me it means no counting but eating reasonably. I will go back to counting on Sunday.

My other excuse is that I haven't made it to the grocery store and my food choices are really limited read: take out. I had a really big burger last night with fries, I will admitt that but bacon cheeseburgers are a par tof my life, just a small part now.

So groceries on Saturday and back to counting and planning in Sunday. It's all good in the hood.

Take care and I hope you are all do well this week, you deserve it!

PS back to blogging too.

healing

Still working on the healing process, my finger is pretty gross, the bandage is big but the pain is minimal thank goodness. I still feel like a big dumb ass and wish I could go back and be a little more careful in my cutting.

I am doing ok food wise, I was down the 2lbs that I gained last week so that is a step back in the right direction. I am missing my meeting right now because the weather is really bad and I had to park my car in a garage for the night. I have missed my last few meetings but have made the effort to weigh in.

Ok well I am still reading your blogs you are all doing a great job!! I am off to rebandage my finger stump. ; )