Christmas food coma..

Junk! The holiday junk is out of my system and I am ready for a new plan. My trouble time is the evening as it is for a lot of people and I tend to really waste a lot of points on junk that I do not need or even really want. So I am going back to a way of tracking that I have found really helpful in the past. I dont have a fancy name for it or know where I even got the idea but here it is.

I usually refer to it in my head as reverse tracking. I basically start my points day at dinner( or supper, the evening meal) time. Then if I want to snack in the evening then I know I am taking away points from the next day's breakfast or lunch. I also find it much easier to lighten my points on my breakfast/lunch meals than dinner. I think it will stop that mindless evening snacking because I am not out of points at the end of the day rather I am still counting my daily points.

It is kind of a pain to track online this way, I will basically be writing my dinner in the breakfast column. Well I guess its not that hard haha.

I weighed in at 175.8 this morning which was up 2lbs from 2 weeks ago. I plan to really get some veggies in this week and work on eating my breakfast again. Of course money is tight so it can be tough to get all those veggies but I am going to see what I can do.

Big news

SO the husband and I have decided that we will be starting our family, this summer. I am going to really focus, I need to be healthy and lose some weight before I have to gain it all back haha. In a seriousness it is true I do not want to get pregnant at this weight. I would like to drop at least 35lbs so that when I am pregnant I don't get much heavier than I am now.

Well thats the news, I cannot believe I am saying this! Wow, I better enjoy the time I have left!

Crappy blogger

Wow, I have been a really crappy blogger as of late. I could list 100 excuses but the truth is that I haven't been doing it. I haven't tracked a full week in over a month. This week has been bananas, I haven't even been trying. I keep trying to snap out of it but it just hasn't happened yet.

I really need to get it together. I have the next 2 weeks off, perfect timing for a revamping my eating. Of course there is that pesky Christmas thing to deal with but that's ok. I am going to try to see it as a challenge. There are 56 days until my cruise, enough said.

light

Hey guys! I am finally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. All of my grad school assignments are done. I just have 1 week left of student teaching (until January) and 2 presentations to go. All the work for the presentations is done so I just have to present them no big deal really.

Weight wise I am back down to 173.8 as of this morning. Last week I didn't track or count at all. I ate out and had treats with no regard for points. Its kind of crazy. I am glad to be back down to my lower weight but it bothers me that when I try to follow the plan I don't lose then I have a week like the last one a drop 2lbs. It just doesn't make a lot of sense. It really makes me wonder about this program. It also makes me wonder if I am not getting enough points for my activity level during the day.

Goals for this week include:

relaxing (destressing)
taking my vitamins daily
tracking every day

What? That won't fit you.

SO last night at dinner out with friends we were talking about what we were wearing to the holiday party we are throwing next week. My lovely, beautiful, thin, gorgeous friend Em says hey can I borrow that shirt it will go great my my skirt. My reply "this won't fit you" , "no seriously it is too big" She says "just give it to me, it will fit" Holy crap. There is no way we could fit into the same size come on. I will believe it when I see it. I will keep you posted.

20lbs

Its amazing how easily we forget how far we have come. Today I picked up two ten pound weights and held them to my side. Wow, How did I manage to move around 20lbs heavier. I am still getting in my daily activity and this coming week will surely be a challenge!

I am doing my lead teaching this week which means that the classroom is basically mine. I am really excited and not nervous really at all. It helps that I have subbed in this classroom 3 times, so I have a good idea of what to expect. I will have 2 formal observations by supervisors and an end of the internship meeting next week. Busy times, but it will be fun.

I cannot wait until the next two weeks are over and then I will have 2 weeks off! Then 2 weeks of front-loading classes and a new internship. I will hopefully get to meet my new mentor teacher next week at some point. I'm not sure who it will be but I am ready to find out!

So in other words this coming week will be fun, scary, intense, tiring, and over in a flash.

working out day 1

Day 1 - 30 minute walk, hills.

Thursday will be my rest day.

Cancel on the 10lbs

SO I have decided that losing 10lbs before Christmas would be fabulous BUT it really is not a healthy way to think about it. So I am changing my goal/bet with my husband. Instead I am going to focus on something I can control. I am going to aim for a positive.

I am going to workout 6 days a week until Christmas. If I stick to it I will get my mani/pedi right before we head up to see the family for Christmas. I am therefore rewarding something I can truely control.

I know myself and if I didn't get a good loss the first week then I would say screw it. Instead I am making a positive choice to be more healthy. I am not saying that all you guys who want to do the 10lbs are wrong or making a bad choice, just that I know myself. SO here is to being more active and hey maybe to losing 10lbs too!

10lbs by Christmas!

I want to lose 10lbs before Christmas. My husband has said I can get a mani/pedi if I do! I really really want to do this. I'm going to have to really buckle down and focus but I think it is possible. I know I will have to really push myself to get there, but it is time to do it.

I am off to go do some planning for the week and weekend. I thought about joining a Christmas challenge, anyone know of a good one?

Need some help

Ok I need your help. Please tell me how you get yourself back on track? How do you refocus your self? I need to stop coasting and start moving in the right direction again. HELP!

I am going on my cruise in 2.5 months!

coasting

I need to get on with it already, enough coasting. Enough doing the bare minimum and getting matching results. I am done screwing around. There is less than 3 months until the cruise! I am heading out of town Tuesday for the week and I will be out of my comfort zone for sure. Which means I need a plan.

Thanksgiving day doesn't worry me so much, not even that there will be 2! It is more of the filler meals I worry about. A bag of chips here, a drive through meal or two there, and not to mention none of my go to foods.

So my plan is to hit up the grocery store when I get there and pick up some food to carry us through the week. I need to stay away from the chips and bags of oreos! I usually bake while I am up there which is fun but cookie dough is not a good thing to eat! I am also making thanksgiving dinner on Friday so that will keep me quite busy.

Overall I think it will be ok, I am really hoping to lose a pound or two while I am there. Its not likely but it would be lovely. I am going to focus on what foods are important and those that I don't get to eat other than at the holidays. SO thats the plan also I will have no internet while I am gone so don't miss me too much!

Normal

I felt normal today! I went and tried on matron of honor dresses with a couple of skinny girls and felt normal. We changed in the same fitting room serveral times and zipped each other up. This is one of those girl expiriences that I didn't have before now. I was always too embarassed or uncomfortable. When the sales person asked my size I didn't hesitate. I said 14 or 16, probably closer to a 16. no shame. I found a dress that looks lovely on me and I cannot wait to wear it. For the record the scale was up 2.1lbs today, whatever.

When I look at the pictures from today I realized that I look pretty good, normal sized. Of course I looked bigger than the other 2 girls but not in a shocking way, in a ..we are built differently kind of way. It was really fun! I love love love dresses!

sheer exhaustion.

People are getting sick. My friend whose wedding I am in thinks she has swine flu. We are going to try on dresses without her tomorrow. I have had a crappy week but I am still excited to try on dresses! I know that even after a week of not doing so well I haven't undone all the progress I have made.

I do have to say I have been feeling exhausted. I'm not sure if it is because I am about to get my period, I haven't gotten enough quality sleep, or that I am getting sick. It also may be because my eating hasn't been very well rounded. I haven't gotten much in for fruits and veggies this week. I'm pretty sure it is due to a mix of all these things.

I was ready for bed at 7:30 last night, I fought it though until about 10. Tonight I think I will try to get to bed by 9. I have been really good about taking my vitamins at least I have that!

Tomorrow starts a new WW week, a better week for sure.

piglet (warning bummed out post ahead)

I ate like a piglet today. I binged, I ate beyond the point of feeling sick, then I ate more. I should know better than to buy a bag of chips and a tub of dip. As a matter of fact I am sitting here right now thinking that I would like to go finish it off.

Instead, I tried on my tankini for the cruise. Not happy with that whole situation. At this point if I do not lose 10-15lbs by February I will need to purchase another suit. Craptastic.

The thing that makes me the most upset is that I am in control of this, I can change this. I really wish I could go back to weight watchers meetings but we just cannot afford it. I am feeling pretty out of control today and I don't like it. I tried cleaning the apt and got somethings done but I still have a long way to go. I wish someone could just slap me and snap me out of this funk.

I'm really tired. I babysat last night and didn't get home until midnight, up at 7 for my internship. This is not helping my situation thats for sure. I am going to pop in a movie and lay in bed. I suck today. I sucked pretty much all week. This is not the state of mind that I need to be in as I head into the holidays. Somethings got to shift.

Bed, Movie, Sleep.

Dear Self

Dear Self,
There are 3 months until your cruise. You have lost 20lbs, Good Job! Your goal was 40lbs, (sad face). You seem to be getting lax in your eating and don't exercise much. Your house is a mess and your workload is ridiculous. This is NOT an excuse to settle. Maybe you won't reach your 40lb goal but you would probably be happy with another 10lbs gone. You are a success because you haven't given up and you are at your lowest adult weight yet. You are worthy of reaching your goals and being healthy. Don't give up on yourself. Start off slow, little steps.

This weekend make a goal of organizing and cleaning your apartment. When that's done sneak up a few Christmas decorations to boost your moral. (tell husband to shut up, it makes you happy and it is almost Thanksgiving anyways) On Sunday you are trying on bridesmaid dresses, enjoy yourself and embrace the changes in your body. Set yourself up to win going in to the holidays.

You are worth it, do it for yourself. Keep up the good work.

Sincerely,
Your Self

I'm not going to lie, I feel much better and more in control after writing that letter to myself. Give it a try. Love you all!

Goals

Holy moly! I looked back at my weight loss and while for the most part it is a downward slide it still shocked me to see how long it takes me to lose! On average I lose 1-2 lbs and then nothing for 3 to 5 weeks! This is a little messed up! I need to figure out how to get some consistent weight loss. It seems almost like I have no control. Whether I eat all my points, just my dailies, my activity it doesn't seem to give me a consistent result. I know this becasue I looked back on the weeks that I lost and they were all different.

For a control freak like it this is rough. I want an answer, someone to tell me what to do. I know I'm not going to get one. I just have to keep going and focus on making good choices. For the record it also seems the more I work out the less I lose!

Please I know its not muscle, we are talking I go to Zumba the next day I have gained a pound. Sometimes I wish I could just skip the scale but I need the validation.

I know everyone has days when they just want to scream. Today is my day. I am literally going to scream then I am going to move on. I am going to go to zumba, I am going to go for a run this week, and I am going to count every freaking point that goes into my mouth.

I want to hit the 160's by Thanksgiving. That is 3.3lbs. That is my goal. How will I get there?

1. eat breakfast, take vitatmins, and flax oil.
2. Eat at home
3. Zumba, run, and walk.

If you made it this far in this post thank you for listening. I won't let you down. I have not been this close to the 160's since 2001. I will get there this month, I want it so bad. I need to keep my eye on the prize baby!

Challenge

So while reading Andrea's blog I saw that she was fast approaching the dreaded 20 minute run week of c25k. Me being the dummy that I am challenged her that if she kept going that I would start running again. Guess what happened ! She did it! I am so proud. BUUUUUTT that means now I have to hold up my end of the bargain.

My stomach is still feeling a little queasy so I haven't started running yet. But I will! I promise. It is on my list of things to do this week!

Get it together!

Ok so this may not be entirely about weight loss but I'm sure there is a connection.

I need to get it together. I am so lucky, I have everything I need and a great husband. Sure we struggle with money sometimes, I am to busy, and I am stressed.

None of this will change. I just need to get it together.

So to start I need to get some school work done, planned, and feel accomplished. I need to schedule and know I will have designated times to get all this work done.

I need to organize my house and keep it that way. This is an unneeded stress in my life.

I need to start the writing diet, which will help me express my feelings and clear my head.

I need to schedule some regular activity, I have already started with Zumba but I would like to get some running back in my life.

I really need to reconnect with my husband. I am cranky, I don't want to be around him and he doesn't deserve to be treated like that. He is so good to me but I just tend to want to be alone a lot when I am stressed. I am a control freak and I know that plays a part in wanting to be alone and work through things on my own. I'm not sure how to change this other than to do the things list above to cut the stress and let me feel in control.

Its a lot to do. I am going to start with conquering some school work today since I am home sick. It is the perfect time to catch up. This weekend I will work on cleaning the house, maybe getting a run in, and starting to read the writing diet book.

sicky

I came home from school sick today. My tummy hurts but no pig flu don't worry. But being as clever as I am I decided that since I am sick and dont want to make dinner that I should eat the ww soup that is in my pantry. Should is a funny word. Instead of the soup, I ordered pizza. Its on it's way. Probably not the best choice but I'll own it. I want it, I'm tired, crabby, and I will count it.

Zumba

Tonight was my first Zumba class. I have to say I spent a little bit of time feeling foolish, missing steps, stopping regrouping and trying again. It wasn't hard but I am the type that if I get out of rhythm I have to take that time to stop and start again. The woman leading the class made some really good comments (to the class not just me) that helped me through my awkwardness. She said things like " I know you think you look really silly right now but you don't!" and " focus on the music don't worry about the steps".


The verdict is that I am going back on Wednesday! I think that once I get the steps down I will be able to feel more confident in going.

Zumba

I am going to ZUMBA tomorrow!! It is my first time and I am really really excited and realy really freaked out! I have never done a exercise class and I have terrible coordination! I hope I can keep up!

Queen of the Plateau

I know I have written about this before but I feel like it is worth repeating. I've have finally given in to the pattern of my weight loss. I am Queen of the Plateau. I usually plateau for 2-3 weeks before I lose maybe for a couple weeks. It sucks.

It is unfair, sucky, and not at all cool. The truth is that, it is what it is. I know this was a reason that I have given up on myself before. I feel like I can accept the plateau knowing that eventually I will lose again. And that is what it is all about. As long as the number on the scale is getting smaller then its all good.

Thoughts and reactions like this, make me realize how much this time is different. I know that I am going all the way this time. I am not freaking out anymore when the scale goes up or if I go over my points. This is my life.

WHAT!?

I was down 3lbs this week! I am down to my lowest weight 173.6!

The writing diet

SO I just purchased the book The Writing Diet hoping that it will help me work through some things in my life. I know I am an emotional eater and I eat out of boredom almost daily. I am working on this but I could use some help. In the past writing has always helped me work through issues so why not bring that tool back into my life.

I'm not going to lie with all this school work, my internship, not working, and seasonal changes I am worried about my mental health. I have already noticed that my fuse is short and that I am pushing people away (including my husband) and I know these are signs of problems. I want people in my life but I keep shutting them out wanting to be left alone. Everyone drives me nuts! My husband drives me up the wall by simply breathing! I need an outlet, a hobby, or something.

Flax

Has anyone tried taking flax seed oil pills?

2 weeks

It ahs been two weeks of being out of control in my eating. I mean I have been trying to follow healthy guideline and eat moderately well but there have been far too many splurges and I completely stopped tracking...never good.

I woke up this morning (almost afternoon) and had a salad. I tracked that salad and enjoyed it with a nice cold bottle of water. I am going to pick up some groceries and make a plan for the week. I am really going to try to get some more walking in this week because soon there will be snow and I wont be able to walk outside as much!

bummed

Holy crap, My other sister in law is now pregnant too. My husband and I are offically the oldest and only couple in the family without children. This bums me out pretty bad, I have been really wanting children lately even more than before.

I know it isn't possible for us right now. I am still finishing up my teaching degree, have no health insurance, and we are still in debt. Of course both sister in laws are in the same boat but don't care.

I hate being the responsible one. It sucks.

Shredding

Ok so I bailed on the Shredding. I did it on Sunday and my legs are still killing me. I just cannot do it right now, I have too much going to on to be in pain all day! I think it would be different if I weren't on my feet all day chasing the kiddos. Some days I dream of a desk job!

I'm going to keep up my walking and eating within my points. I'll work on the shred another time.

Mini goals!

Oh how I love mini goals! So here are my weekly mini goals!

Track everything, everyday.
DO the shred 5xs (this is going to kill me!)
Walk 5xs (30-60 minutes)

I want to focus this week on using exercise as a tool to relieve stress rather than a cause of stress. I need to schedule it in and think of it as treat. Because the truth is, it is a treat. Some people don't have the ability or choice to exercise. I am able.

For the record I was up .8lb today. But since I was up 1 last week I am really up 1.8lbs. This week I know I will in the least get rid of that 1.8 and hopefully a little more. Well I am off to go make my grocery list so that I can make this happen.

Ready

So to make sure I am back on schedule for my healthy life I made a date. Sounds funny right? Well let me explain. I called up my friend Em and made a date to check out some hiking trails I learned about this week. So in the least, I will get some activity in!

snowball

It has been on e heck of what I call a snowball week.. It all started from my trip last weekend. I didn't track and overate. BY Tuesday I was promising to get back on track. Wednesday through Friday were ...well my week is shot, I'm not going to lose anyways days.

Today has been a just finish it up and get it out of you system kinda day. I will weigh in tomorrow. I think I did a little damage. I'm sure I am up at least 2lbs. Dammit.

Not to worry....motivation is in the mail! I purchased 2 tankini tops and four bottoms! All from the clearance on the Victoria's Secret website for....wait for it....$50 including tax and shipping. Wooowooo! Hopefully they fit and look good. But either way I will always want them to look better so I think it is going to help me focus on healthy eating and exercise.

For the record I feel sick. I feel like I am making myself sick. I am remembering what my life used to be, how I used to always feel full and "hungry" and lazy. I am ready to snap out of this. I am done. Starting now, I am tracking and focusing on healthy eating guidelines.

Wonton wrappers

Today I am making these and I will let ya know what I think about them. One note the recipe calls for ff cheese I went with regular sharp cheddar. I decided that I would bring them to the Halloween party I am going to next weekend but wanted to try them out first.

EDIT They were really good. I personally would add some salt and pepper next time and maybe if I don't mind the extra calories some bacon crumbles. PS the sour cream dip is a must for this recipe. I used Daisy brand sour cream which to me tastes just like full fat sour cream.

I'll take it.

I find it so odd that my weight and measurements haven't changed much but the way my clothes fit is hugely different. I'll take it.

Suckage

I'm kinda sucking this week, but its ok. I am going to get back on track soon. Too much snacking. I'm getting back to working out, starting the shred again. I am going to get my eating together, gotta stop this "my week is shot" state of mind. I will track tomorrow, I will stay within my dailies. I will. I will.

crap day.

Oh what a day. It has been a eat everything, sit on my ass and watch tv kinda day. I feel sick and I want to cry.

This is a crappy day by far but there is a bright side. To start I have felt in control all day. I knew I was over eating but that I was eating relatively healthy things like cereal and portion controlled snacks, I just ate too often. I drank my water and enjoyed everything I ate. It was not binging by any means. In the past it would have meant mcdonalds, ice cream sundaes, and chips with dip.

I made a decision today. I decided that I would eat until I felt satisfied but I simply felt empty all day. I feel yucky now. I could really use a salad haha.

The important point is that I still feel in control. I know that tomorrow I will go back to counting my points and focusing on nutrition. I know that this doesn't mean that I am completely off track. It doesn't mean I should give up, it means that I need to refocus. I am in this until the end, not just until I can't do it anymore. All in all I am ok. Tomorrow is a new day.

stress monkey

I'm feeling so stressed. I think it is all getting to me. There is so much going on with school and my internship. I just feel like I am going to explode.

I have been thinking about my life and so much will be changing in the next year. We are looking to move to a new area which is incredibly different. We are moving up north to a smaller less populated less diverse, more closed minded area.

It isn't ideal but it is where my husband's family lives and we can afford to buy a home there. We have been talking about having children in the next few years, once I finish school, we move, we buy a house, and I get a job. We just cannot afford to live where we are now. Homes in Portland, Maine are so expensive and the taxes are out of this world. We could afford a shack on the train tracks here. Or we can move and live in a nice home and have children.

I'm talking about living a 45 minute drive from the nearest Target/city area. There is a grocery store and one restaurant. Its pretty scary for me. I have never lived in the country. I hope it is the right decision.

I have so much work to do for school and student teaching. I have to do portfolios, teach and record myself teaching! I hate that. I just want to be left alone to teach. I also have 3 grad level methods classes which give me assignments I have to fit into the school day.

To top this all off I am trying to get healthy and lose some weight. I just want so badly to skip ahead a year and be working. I want to find a home and work on building our life. I am sick of this constant state of pressure.

A couple of questions

So I gained a pound this week after my trip. I'm not too shocked and I do think it may have to do with the mcdonalds I had yesterday..hello salt.

TMI alert. I may have some problems keeping things moving and I hate the idea of taking laxatives. I eat loads of fiber, drink my water, and get in activity this should not be a problem. SO question one is do you find that getting in your healthy oils in helps with constipation? I also read that taking magnesium helps move things along too. Any one try this?

I am heading to planned parenthood today to get back on the pill. I am a little nervous. I am really hoping I don't gain a ton of weight getting back on the pill. I hate that I am putting hormones into my body but I think I need the no baby reassurance and I am sick of my face breaking out (I am breaking out due to being off the pill) I haven't been on the pill for about a year. I also hate getting a papsmear like everyone else too of course. Not a fun thing.

I really am feeling stressed out about my internship and about moving and finding a job teaching! I am sick of being observed in the classrom. I am sick of school! BLAH!'

food is not the answer.

I have wanted ice cream for the last hour. I'm not hungry. I keep telling myself....If hunger is not the problem, then food is not the answer. I have also decided that just because I have 1 point left doesn't mean I need to use it. It is 10pm and I am going to be ...without ice cream. Goodnight!

Dinner

So tonight I made some tacos for dinner, nothing special but there was one thing I noticed that was different. I only ate 2. I can remember eating 5 or 6 back in the day and not even blink an eye. I ate 2 tacos and felt full. That is a big change mentally and caloricly! I am liking this new eating style.

This past week I have been doing a lot of changes like this. For example I eat a lot of subway during the week (2-3xs) and I usually get a $5 footlong because it is a good deal and I can eat it. This week however I have been ordering 6inch sandwiches with a bag of sunchips (which I usually save most of for later) and I have felt perfectly content. When I only have the choice of a smaller (but appropriate) portion then I feel full just the same as if I had eaten a larger portion.

I am proud that I have been able to listen to my body and see how it has changed. I don't need as much food anymore, my body is a little smaller and so is my stomach. I am adapting.

Offical weigh in

I stayed the same according to my new scale. According to my old scale I lost 4lbs. I am kinda wishing I didn't buy the new scale, it is almost like gaining 4lbs. I drives me nuts that scales differ so much! I wish I could add those 4 to my total weigh lost because it tells me that when I first weighed in I was actually 4lbs heavier. I worked hard for those 4lbs this week! I feel like I am ripping myself off but using the new scale. SO I plan on getting rid of the old scale donating it to Goodwill so that I can just move on and use the new scale.

Oh well on to other news, it is clear that not eating my flex points worked. I haven't lose 4 lbs since my first week! I am going to try it again this week but since I am going away this weekend I will probably use some then.

Yesterday I got my first mani/pedi. I loved the pedicure! The manicure was nice too but I think that the pedicure was so much more relaxing. I have a lot to do today, homework, housework, and grocery shopping! I hope yoou all have a great Sunday

New scale. good or bad?

So I got my new scale today and did a comparison to my old scale. Let me remind you that I replaced the old scale because it wasn't very accurate it gave a couple different numbers when you stepped on and off it. So when I compared my weight from the old scale to the new scale I saw that the new scale say I am 2lbs heavier which doesn't really bother me except for on little reason. I lost 2 lbs this week (as of yesterday, weigh in is tomorrow) which means when I weigh myself according to the new scale I haven't lost anything!

Ok yes physically I have lost 2lbs but since I am going to be using the new scale only I will have to report that I stayed the same on ww! I realize that the number doesn't matter but it helps to see that I have lost that 2lbs. Also according to Mr. old scale I hit my all time low yesterday of 172, Mr. new scale differs. Well I will offically weigh in tomorrow for the first new scale weigh in and I guess I will just move on from there.

Should not have....

...bought that bag of lindt chocolates. I literally ate the whole bag from 4pm until now. My husband ate 2. Oh dear lord I feel sick.

I didn't work out today either. crap that is not good.

I spent my entire week staying within my daily points so I guess that is good. 5 days on track but it only takes one binge to ruin it. Oh well back on track.

In control for a road trip

Just a note. As I mentioned in a previous post today I am planning on a trip up north to the inlaws. Typically once I get in the car to drive up all diets are off. I give up the second the door closes behind me. First stop is always for coffee which leads to a donut or bagel. Umm not thank you. This trip I am going to change that.

I will get coffee but I am going to pack some food to eat/ eat a big lunch before I leave. I know that I cannot control much about the meals I have this weekend but I am going to focus on portion control. I am going to avoid all the sweets (my MIL always bakes when we are there). I could ask her not to make them but that is not realistic. There are other people living there and I am not going to deprive them of treats that they only get to enjoy every once in a while. I will just have to focus. I know I can do it.

I think just writing this down helps me feel control. I know that I can do it if I plan. If all else fails I am going to keep avoiding using my flex points so I will have those to use if needed. I can also get some walking in while I am there. I still have a week + until we go so I just need to keep this in mind. I am in control of how this weekend goes.

NSV

I'm a potato loving FREAK! I baked 2 potatos today thinking that I would eat one for lunch and keep the other for home fries later in the week. SO I ate the first potato, yum delicious and I start thinking hrmm theres another potato out there, I might as well eat it, I mean its only 4 points with some butter. I put it on my plate stuck it in the microwave to heat it back up.

I headed into the living room waiting for the beep. Then I stopped said to myself "you aren't hungry anymore why are you eating the other one?" SO I turned around pulled out some foil tossed the second potato in and put it in the fridge.

Moral of the story, stop think and listen to your body. You might not need that second helping.

home day

So I decided to stay home today and take a little break. My weekends have benn really full and I haven't had a day off to myself for a while. So far it has been a good morning. I woke up and hopped on the scale, I saw a good number.

I have to say eating just my 23 points must work. I wish I had realized this 4 month ago. Its not easy to stay with in such a small amount of points but so far it hasn't been too bad. Of course I haven't had to eat out yet either. I wonder why I have always been told to eat my flex? I suppose I should have realized that I would lose more if I didn't but I guess I thought the 35 was built into my weekly calories.

I am kind of shocked to think about how many calories I must have been consuming when I used all my flex points. AND I thought I was being good and dieting. It really pisses me off that if I had just reined myself in those extra points that I could have lost so much more weight. Oh well I guess now I know. SO maybe basically the flex points are just to keep you from going crazy when you go over your points? I feel like I am looking at ww from new eyes.

Next weekend we will be traveling up north and visiting the family. It should be nice but also it should be a food challenge. On the plus side I am (from todays impromptu weigh in) about 17lbs lighter than the last time the family has seen me. It should be interesting to see if they notice and even if they do they might not say anything. I had been waiting to visit until November so that it would be an even bigger difference but that's ok.

Anyways this is post one of the day off ...you know there will probably be more since I will be home thinking about life with my computer.

I have been logging my food on both ww and calorie count and have found that although my points are correct I am taking in way too many calories! I have used 22 out of the 24 points today but have consumed 1300 calories. To put that in perspective, I need to take in 1200 or less calories to lose 2lbs a week. Very interesting.

I am still sticking to ww this week to see what happens but I am definitely leaning towards going to counting calories.

EDIT- I checked my points quiz and since I hit 174 this week I have now dropped down to 23 points a day. BTW why don't your points adjust on thier own as you log your weight online?

randomness

I don't want to end up 50 years old and still hating the way I look. I have fought too long and hard. I want to be a hottie at 30. The real reason that is the basis for wanting to lose weight is that I want to be healthy when I get pregnant. I don't want to have the baby and have to worry about losing 50+ lbs when it is all said and done. I want to be a healthy pregnant person and have minimal weight to lose when the baby is born. This is something I think about a lot. I want to be able to focus on my children not my weight.

I want them to know what a healthy lifestyle is all about. I never knew how to eat healthy. The only veggies that I was offered as a child were corn (starch), potatos (starch),cucumbers, peas(blech) and lettuce on taco night. Lucky for me my husband loves everything so even if I don't eat the veggies like I should he will be able to set a good example and I plan to pretend to like all the veggies too! my kids will be veggie lovers whether they like it or not!

New scale

I just ordered this scale and I hope it proves to be as accurate as the reviews say. I also hope it doesn't say I weigh more than I think I do!

Weekly Goals

Ok so I am setting my weekly goals according to some advice that I have received on my posts.

- Try not to use any flex points
- cut back to 1 diet coke a day
- Run 3 days, walk 2

So that is it for now although there are many other areas I know I will work on too. Those are the ones I am more focused on. I am trying to get more used to eating less processed foods, more fruit for snacks and veggies with meals. I really need to put in the effort in order to see the results that I want.

Down a lb?

So yesterday I hadn't lost an ounce but this morning my scale said I was down a pound. DO I believe it? Well here are my concerns, I took midol yesterday since I started my period so it may be that the bloat was down a little this morning, and the other odd this is that my scale sucks.

I have 2 scales, they are off from each other by about 4lbs. The regular spring scale is the one that I go by because my digital scale has always been high( I used to weigh myself before I went to ww meetings and compare). The spring scale seems to bounce around after I weigh myself sometimes it bounces back lower or higher than 0, does that mean the number I get is off? I don't really know. I think I need a new scale. I think I am going to do a little research and purchase a new one. SO if you have any suggestions I am taking them.

Basically I am going to take the lower weight and hope it sticks! That means I am down 15lbs. I am hoping that this means I have broken this plateau. Once I lose 2 more lbs and I am at my lowest weight in 10 years!!! Maybe next week!

Life as I know it.

I'm ready for something to happen. I am ready to get out of this rut I am in. I am working working working in every aspect of my life and yet nothing seems to be happening. I am floating in school and eating simply. I am moving along in my student teaching at a snails pace. Although that is one place that will change because Monday is my first day of subbing on my own. It is in my regular classroom and the kids have been out of control this past week! I hope it goes well.

Sometimes I wish I could skip a year ahead. In a year I see myself moved back to where my husband's family lives, in a home of my own with a job at a school and planning my family. I would be done with school ( 2 classes shy of my masters) and just moving forward with my life. I see myself healthy and fit. Living.

I know that time is precious and I shouldn't wish it away however at this point I would avoid much stress and exhaustion. I am simply tired and ready for a new stage in my life to start. I am doing the work now to set the rest of my life.

I just hope that I am good enough. That I can prove that I deserve a teaching job. I hope our finances are in a good enough state that we can afford a home and then consequently to have a family. I am so full of insecurity right now, I cannot wait to feel more confident and settled.

the switch?

So I sneaked a day early peek at the scale today...no change WTF? I did get my period this afternoon so that may have an effect on my weight but geez.

I decided that I am giving weight watchers one more week then I am going to cancel my online subscription. I will then try to move on to counting calories. My main worry about counting calories is that there is no true accountability, but I suppose that there isn't really any with ww online either. I think I might try caloriecount.com again. So I guess this week will decide how I proceed.

What has also what this on is that my friend that I am going on the cruise with has been using the calorie counting method and has had much better results than I have. I think that maybe I just need to focus on calories in and calories out. My first question is..What do you do if you are going to spurge and go over your calories? Ww did prepare me for that....DO you just cut back the next day or work out more? I am thinking that counting calories may be more realistic than ww. I am so confused.

What do you think? Have you switched from counting points to counting calories?

I'm pissed off at myself. A whole month of not losing any weight is unexceptable. I know I must be doing something wrong, missing something. I am following the healthy guidelines, keeping to my points, changing up my food, getting exercise and anything else I can think of. I must be drinking melted butter in my sleep! Does homework have calories? I am on my feet all day long in a classroom moving around. We walk a mile a day most days, and I am running 2-3 times a week. My points are set for the lowest activity level. I eat all my points, flex, and activity too some weeks.

On area I know I should work on is eating less precessed foods. I could cut back on the diet coke and drink more water. (I do get the 6 servings of water recomended).

I feel like something has got to give. I have been so patient with my weight loss this time but I do need some progress I am human after all. Please understand I am not in any way shape or form planning on giving up, like I would have before. I am not binging, just trucking along.

Bottom line keep me in your weight loss prayers, I could use the help!

This is week four of weighing 175lbs. It kinda sucks. I'm disappointed because I am following the program. I know that my only choice is to wait it out and keep doing what I am doing. I really hope I see a change next week. Clearly eating all my points (including activity) was a bad idea. I will try to stick to my daily points and flex points this week. Possibly even trying to keep 1/2 my flex too. There is no way I am meeting my goal at this rate! I need to focus.

I did meet most of my goals. I did drink a bottle of water 5 out of 7 mornings (not too bad). I ran 3 times (check) and I didn't weigh myself until today (check). So not too bad there.

I plan on keeping the same exact goals for this week because I think they are good ones.

Friday morning

I just wanted to say that last night I got some mind boggling new (its ok I was just surprised) and instead of turning to ice cream ( I had already had a frozen yogurt cone!) I hopped on the treadmill and did my run!! Wow I am sooo hoping that this will be a stress reliever trend in my life. AND it totally worked. I felt so much better after I ran, not totally but much.

Well I am off to school (student teaching) then off to class. It's Friday, yay! I have to baby sit for a wedding on Saturday from 2:30pm to 1 am and it is a 40 minute drive from my house. SHould be a long night however I will make god cash and be able to get some homework done after the kiddos go to bed! Theres a plus because there is a lot of it to do!

Exhausted check in

So I just wanted to do a mid week goal check in. So far I have started the day with a 20oz bottle of water, I haven't weighed in and I have run once. All on schedule. Tomorrow is a run day but I am thinking I may have to shift it to Friday since I am in class until 6:30pm. We shall see how I feel when I get home. In that case my third run would push to Sunday which is technically a new week but I am trying to be flexible. I realize I could just get up and run in the am tomorrow but I just don't wanna!! (said with a pout)

SO far so good!

Will I ever wear a bikini?

I have always thought that I would never wear a bikini that I had ruined my body. I have had stretch marks on my belly and hips as long as I can remember. A lot of them are old faded to white but still visable. My question is for those of you who are near your goal....Do you bare your belly? Have your stretch marks changed with the weight loss? Will I even wear a bikini!?

Goals for the week

Goal #1
NO weighing myself until Sunday
Goal #2
Start the day with a full bottle of water
Goal #3
run 3 times (tues, th, sat)

10 weeks

Just a glimpse into my thoughts.

In 10 weeks I will see my family who I haven't seen since July. I hadn't lost a noticable amount of weight last time I saw them so my progress went pretty much unnoticed. I have 10 or so weeks until I see them again. If I could lose 10lbs in those 10 weeks then I would be down a total of 25lbs when they saw me. That would be so sweet.

So 10 weeks and 10 pounds is the plan. I want to make a splash when I see everyone at Thanksgiving. It is actually my husband's side of the family who we see for this holiday including the sister in law from hell who thinks it is her goal in life to prove she is better than us. I know I know I need to be doing this for me not for the effect on other people but boy would losing those pounds make me feel good!!

5 to go.

I have 5lbs to go before I hit my 10%. I have never hit my 10% the most I have lost is 18lbs. I am at 14lbs down right now so I have 5 more to go to hit that goal. I also haven't been under 173 in 5 or so years. 173 was the lowest I ever hit at weight watchers and then I plateaued for a while and gave up.

I am queen of the plateau. I honestly never lose for more than 2 or 3 weeks in a row followed by 2-3 weeks of plateauing. My body just doesn't want to give it up! But I am not falling for it this time. This time I am going to ride out the plateaus until they break. I am done screwing around. I will keep going until I get to my goal weight. At this pace it will be in a year or two but what ever it will be worth it when it happens.

PS hopefully not longer than 2 years because we plan on starting our family then!

Checking in

I am feeling a little lost. I think because I haven't seen progress in a couple weeks. I have been eating pretty well but maybe not well enough. I'm not saying that the program isn't working but I guess I know when I don't give it my all then I can't expect results. I'm trying but I guess not hard enough.
I think that I need to mix it up a little. I am working on keeping my points in check, probably not using all of my flex and none of my activity. That's the plan Stan. I am also kicking up my activity this week. Did I mention that the school I am interning at does a walking program? Most days weather permitting we walk a mile in the morning. I am loving it.

nike+

I'm having some issues with my Nike mini. I ran today but it isn't showing up and my mini is now saying private again. Its more than a little frustrating when you run and don't get credit for it. It is really nice to work towards a goal and unfortunately this run isn't counting towards my nike goal of running x amount of times in a month. Stinkin technology!

Workout plan?

SO I am thinking about setting a workout schedule hoping that it will help me stay accountable. When I workout I tend to eat better and feel better so I think that it is key to get that back on track for sure. SO here is the schedule I came up with.
Sun- 30 day shred
Mon-yoga
Tues-run
Wed- yoga
Thurs- run
Fri- walk
Sat- Run

It looks pretty good to me however I have been so exhausted when I get home from teaching that it will definitely be tough. Just thinking about doing the 30 day shred makes me want to cry but I figured that it was a good idea to get it in there to make sure I am really pushing myself. I am also turning back to the c25k because I think that it really helped keep me on track. Once I started doing my own intervals things seemed to drop off pretty quick.

I have always struggled with getting bored, I can't seem to stick to much so I figured that this schedule has some good variety in which to keep me interested. I think it is also good to know what the plan is. I wont be thinking "oh I should run or something" It will be "Oh it is Saturday I need to run."

I have also GOT to start getting up early again. I can get so much more accomplished. I have been thinking that working out in the morning isn't going to happen because as hard as it is to get up early it is even harder when you know that the first thing you have to do is workout. I am thinking I will set a schedule for my day scheduling my workout between 3:30 (when I get home from school) and 5:30 making dinner. The only problem with that is that if I don't do it then I know after dinner it probably wont happen at all. Well I think I have a lot of thinking to do, my main point is that I need to do some scheduling to keep myself on track.

Ps I stayed the same this week, better than gaining I suppose. Next week must be a loss!

banana bread

Does anyone have a good healthy (low point) banana bread recipe?

So, I am hanging in here. During my period I was up 5lbs and freaking out but I am back to 175 again now that I am done. Thanks goodness! I think I would have cried! It is so hard to even think when you are trying so hard to be on track and you gain but luckily I was able to keep my head straight and know that it was a false gain.

Tomorrow I am going apple picking at a local farm, FUN. Also while there my cousin who is a photographer is going to do some fun pictures of my husband and I. I am planning on wearing a cute little sundress which is probably and little much for apple picking but should be cute for the pics! Wish me luck!

Excited and Exhausted

I am so BLOATED! God I haven't have a period with this much bloating in ages!I feel huge. I have been trying to drink water to try to get rid of it but nothing seems to be working. I took midol and it is helping with the cramps but geez. It is the first week of school and I look like a house in my dress clothes. I am five days into my TOM and it needs to stop.

Being in the classroom for two days getting ready has kicked my bum. Kids come tomorrow and I think it will make the day fly by, heres hoping. Did I mention I am tired. But I am loving the feeling of being a teacher. I may just be student teaching but it is nice to feel important like I am making a difference.

I am excited and exhausted.

LOVED IT!

By the way I totally looked just like my Nike+ Mini while kayaking haha.

PROOF

SO since my mini is not showing up on the sidebar I have the link to my run to prove I DID run! haha. It was a short one I am just trying to get back on track with my running so I did my own intervals of 1 and 2 minutes with one minute in between of walking.

I have tried using my nike+ for walking but I am going to take the do for a 3-4ish mile walk this afternoon and will try it out. I hope you all are enjoying your Friday. The weather is lovely here I hope it is the same for you!

Oops

I just realized that my Nike Mini is messed up it is saying it is set to private but I have it set to public. I am hoping when I put in my run today it will fix it!? Has it been like that long? Anybody notice?

I'm working on it...

I am in my running clothes right down to my sneakers. I decided that I wanted to finish my coffee and then I will run. To make sure this happens I put on my gear so now I am ready to get this done. I promise I will be running by 2.

That right Nike Mini so shut up! ; P

Thats it....

Thats it, I am throwing down my cards. I have been waiting for the urge to run. It hasn't come and I don't see it coming either. That being said, I WILL run tomorrow. I will. I swear. If I do not run tomorrow and report back to you guys about how amazing it was or if my mini doesn't say I ran than I give you FULL permission to leave me comments calling me awful names. I give you permission to come to my house and play drill sargent. I WILL RUN TOMORROW. I need to keep moving forward.

school blues

I feel like I have been hit with a truck, I have a ton of work to do already and the semester is just starting. I have a long of long range projects which I stink at. I have such a hard time doing work a little at a time so I either end up waiting until the last minute or half assing it early without enough information. I have got to work on that.

Food has been decent but I have been eating a little too much of the good stuff. Still not exercising, just too stinking hot and tired. I have got to get an early morning routine going again. I used to feel so good getting up early and getting work accomplished. I love getting my workout out of the way too but man it is hard to get up when you know the first thing on your to do list is a run. Maybe I will start off with just getting up early and then progress to the working out.

Did I mention that my house is a mess again. I hate that. I am feeling a little walled in right now, I have got to break out of this. Friday I have a meeting for an hour or so then nothing so I think I will use that time to clean while the husband is at work.

I have to teach a lesson to my classmates Thursday (pretending that they are 3rd graders) as if that wasn't bad enough they are video taping it so we can watch and assess how we did. I HATE watching myself on tape, it is the worst. I am so not looking forward to that. I am not too anxious yet but I'm sure I will be a wreck. At least it will be in a small group and I planned my 6 minute lesson to be an activity for them with me simply guiding the activity.

Oh my is it Friday yet?

Goal about to be met.

I am very excited!!! As some of you might know or may have seen on my sidebar I have some life activity goals that I want to meet. One of them that I have wanted to get the courage to do was to go kayacking.

Guess what...I'm going next weekend!!!!!!! A few of my friends and I are all going to one of their parents home which is on Bar Harbor island. They have 5 kayaks for us to use so I am very excited!! I cannot wait to meet one of my activity goals. I have always felt too insecure or unfit to do things like kayaking.

Doing these activities that I see as "healthy people activities" makes me realize how much I have missed out being overweight and insecure. I cannot wait to go, wish for good weather!!

PS another goal of mine is to learn to snowboard and I made a new friend who used to teach snowboarding lesson, who has also graciously offer me free lessons and use of his extra board this winter!! Such a nice guy!

check in

Tomorrow is weigh in day, I checked in this morning and was glad to see that I am back to last weeks weigh in around the 176 area even close to the 175.

I realized that I have really no activity points banked from this week. That feels weird but I know its because it has just been unbearably hot here. I wish we had ac but we don't so I guess this is one of those times where having a gym membership would really be great. Oh well it just isn't worth the cost over the year considering how little I would use it.

I have plans. I am really looking forward to visiting family in November and being noticably smaller. I think in the past I have bounce around the 178-189 area but I think that if I can get to the 160 something range then they will notice the change.

I am so tired to being the one trying to lose weight, losing a little, then gaining it back. It makes me feel like a failure and I think that that is why this time is different. Every time I start to think "oh well I already screwed up I will jsut keep eating" I have been snapping myself out of it. Instead I think things like "well I just bought those size 12's so I better keep going so that they fit" or "this is not a choice I have to keep going". That is a big change in attitude. I AM doing it this time. I know that this is the time that will stick.

It is all about attitude, that is something that I have learned about myself. I know that if I am positive it is much easier. It is just like when you have a big(or any if you are me) loss at the scales the following week is so much more positive and easier to stay on track. So I am trying to keep that in mind, maybe you should too. Keep it positive!

Ready set....go

Ok so I really didn't seem to get it together today. Lately things haven't been going terrible but not good either. I really need to refocus and plan. I need to get my activity in and stop eating out. I need to shop for groceries with a plan in mind. I have the day off tomorrow so I will be able to get some real thinking time in and make a good plan for the coming week. I need to do this, there is no going back now.

On a positive note I bought 2 more pairs of size 12's today!! Loving it. I do think that maybe it is just this brand that I am a 12 but you know what I will take it. It feels good to see some progress.

I have some home organizing to do to help with my refocusing. I need to clear my my life of clutter because I have a lot of work ahead of me with my student teaching and masters classes starting up (classes are already started, 6 hours a day until school starts) I need to be organized or this semester will get away from me.

I need to get my professional clothes ready, figure out what to pack for food while at school, and organize my desk so that it is ready to get some serious work done. I have to get ready. I also need to set a solid schedule for my weekly needs complete with study time and exercise time.

It is all about organization and planning for me! I have got to do it!

PS please let the heat/humidity go away!! I am ready for fall!

Weird week.

Well last week was my birthday week so my eating was a little tough. This week started out with camping (I was forced for a class) during which I had no control over my foods but rather only portion control. So Wednesday (yesterday) was my first chance back to normalcy regarding food. Yesterday wasn't too bad but since it has been so overwhelmingly hot I ended up grazing a lot and going over my points without a feeling of being satisfied really at any point. Today was much of the same, I am just so tired and hot that I haven't got the energy to think about my eating.

I weighed myself this morning and it read up 4-5lbs WTF? I am not freaking out too much about it hoping that it is because I am super bloated and my tummy is quite upset. Hopefully I see a better number tomorrow morning.

I am hoping to gain some sort of control tomorrow. Here is hoping.

400th post

It is hot!! I am feeling so tired and just sluggish! I want to eat a real meal but it is too hot to cook so I have ended up nibbling here and there leading to a few too many points and feeling pretty unsatisfied. I just wish this heat would break so that I can feel human again!

By the way this is my 400th post and I am only down 13lbs from my beginning weight. That is kind of a startling comparison. But I guess whats important is that I AM down and that is sucess. Hopefully but my 500th post I will be 50lbs down.

August Goals

Ok so I am a little late on the August goal setting but hey consider this my half month goals. My first priority is to get back into running on a more regular basis. I think I will really work on schedule, menu, and just basic planning. So here are my remainder of August goals.

1. Run every other day (3-4x's a week)
2. Wake up early (6:30 during the week, 7 on weekends)
3. Exercise first thing in the morning

I haven't been planning dinners lately it is just too hot to cook so it has been sandwiches, salads, cereal, and other quick and simple meals that require very little stove time. We have been just eating dinner when we are hungry instead of making one meal it is kind of a free for all.

It is so stinking hot here I can't take it. We live in an old building with no option of air conditioning, just fans blowing around the same hot air. I feel like I am just drained and my exercise is really hurting becasue of it. As I wrote in my goals I am going to really try to get my workout done in the am before it gets too hot. I looked at the forecast for tomorrow and it will already be in the mid 70's when I get up! ICK.

So tomorrow I will try it and see if it is cool enough to run either way I will be up early for a cold shower!

Weird weigh in

SO today is my weigh in day, in anticipation of a bad number this morning due to going out last night I weighed myself yesterday. I stayed the same according to yesterdays weigh in. According to this morning I gained 4lbs haha. I am glad I made a point to weigh myself early!

It is still hard to believe that I ate/drank enough last night to show a spike in weight like that! Even though I know it isn't a real gain I will be glad when it goes away!!

I am chugging the water today and certainly watching my points. I am not however doing much in the way of moving! Ouch my head. Too much vodka , but a good time was had all around! I danced my booty off for a few hours so that is a plus. It was a hot evening though, I think I sweated a gallon an hour!

Well I am off to drink water and maybe nap! I <3 lazy Sundays!

Good jeans

I bought jeans in a size 12 today.....SIZE 12!! I haven't been in a 12 since high School! I'm wearing them tonight for my birthday celebration outting!! Yay!

OMG

I am three days into the week and already in the hole by 11 points. Ooops. Its my birthday!!

All about the jeans.

I am a size 14. I have no problem with my size, as a matter of fact if I tried on a 16 and it fit I wouldn't mind its just a number. Of course when you change sizes to smaller sizes it is nice. I went to American Eagle today to try on some jeans. I am a short girl so I try on the size there and then order them online in short length because they never have short size 14 in store.

I picked up 3 pairs of 14's and headed for the dressing room. As I slipped the first pair on I was surprised to see them button with ease. They fit good maybe even a little bit loose. Pair number 2 same story. By pair number 3 I was psyched. They all fit! I can remember when no pants fit me. When even 16's were out of the question. It is amazing to go into the dressing room and put on jeans that all fit. I was a happy girl.

When I got home I was thinking that I would hold off on ordering the jeans online. I think I am going to wait until I hit the 20lb down mark and then try them on in 12's. I can't wait to be able to wear a smaller size for one main reason. I hold most of my weight around my hips and waist so the thighs and bum of 14's are always a bit saggy. I think that the size 12's will fit the rest of my body much better.

So I will wait to order new pants until I can fit into 12's. I have plenty of 14's to hold me over.

Food, life, running

Food is ok I am really over my points today but that is what flex is for. I was a little high yesterday too but I have a plan. Tomorrow is my birthday therefore my birthday dinner, more on that later. I am planning on another high point day tomorrow and then I plan on keeping wed, th, and friday pretty low. Saturday is my celebratory night out with the girlies so probably another high point day. So to break it down it will look like this
Sun-medium high points
Mon-high
Tues- high
Wed- low
th- low
fri- low
Sat med high (lots of activity points for all the dancing I plan on doing!)

Overall I think it is a much better plan than previous years. In previous years I would have just said screw it, it is my birthday week I am going to eat all week like it is my job. I would eat EVERTHING I usually avoid. SO you see even if I go a little over this week, it is still much better management that previous years.

I still haven't run yet this week. oops. I have been getting some activity in but no running. Not sure what is up with that but I am waiting for the urge to run. One thing I have learned in my past tries at running it is that I can't force myself. Yeah I have to push through some tough runs but I do not want to make running a chore. As long as I am getting activity in in other ways I feel ok about taking my running training slow.

Tomorrow is a day of relaxing with a little bit of school work mixed in completed with a lovely birthday dinner. Sounds good, doesn't it!?!

Weigh in

I am down 2lbs!! Thats bringing me to 176. Yay what a great week. I worked out a lot less than usual so I was a little shocked that the loss stuck. I even ate out this week!

I use a non digital scale so I tend to round down my pounds but to be honest I was really close to being at 175. I will save that joy for next week when I am all the way there.

I am psyched! This is how weight loss should be. I had this feeling that once I got away from the 180/181 spot that I have been stuck at forever that I would finally start to see some more steady progress. I am feeling good about this.

Little break

I feel like I am on a break right now. I am still eating within my points but I haven't run since Tuesday. I just haven't felt like it. Its ok though I have been dealing with a lot due to my last day at work. I think that the fact that I got my period on my last day helped me be extra emotional about the whole situation. I am still sad that my time there is over and that the center is closing but I have excepted that it is just a part life.

I weighed in down 2lbs this morning which is AMAZING. Hopefully it says the same tomorrow for my official weigh in!

I do have to admit I am a little worried about starting up this summer class that keeps me in the classroom from 9 to 4 all day mon through fri. 3 weeks of it. We are talking sitting for hours at a time. Yuck. I can't do it! I need to move around. I plan on getting up early and working out before class and hopefully walking durring the lunch break, which I assume I will get?!? It seems like it would be nessessary right? I will eat my packed lunch durring the class and walk durring the lunch block. Seems like a good plan since I will be in the class with my best friend so we can chat and walk. All of a sudden the class isn't looking so intimidating from a health point of veiw maybe it will actually prevent me from snacking on random junk all day. I can just pack healthy stuff and snack on that.

I am thinking I will run tomorrow. I need to pick up a pouch for my nike+ sensor so that I can stop just sticking it under my laces. I also need to calibrate it which seems like a pain in the butt but needs to be done reguardless.

Ok so long post, now I am off to relax, drink a diet coke, and watch Dexter.

My tummy hurts

It may be because it is 5pm and all I have eaten today is an ice cream cone.

Not hungry, just tired, and still a little sad.

How to say goodbye..

How do you say goodbye to the people you work with, people who are your friends? How do you say goodbye to preschool children who you love, whose knees you have bandaged and cheeks you have kissed. How do you say goodbye to a job that you love and watch them shut down the building. How does a college decide that closing the childcare center is a way to save money? A childcare center than has been open for over 30 years with many of the original teachers? How can I be proud of a Master's degree in Education from a college that closes a preschool. Don't they realize that they are hypocrites. I hate when money becomes for important than education.

I'm going to miss the hugs, jokes, and joy that you get from being with children. They are like my siblings and I am going to miss them so much. I have cried twice today at work. I hate this.

Running

So I am having a bit of a hard time moving on with the c25k program. I am still doing 3-5-3-5 intervals of running but it is so tough to get through the fives. I am wondering if I should cut back to the every other day running as the program is designed? I need to get activity every day though or else it is too easy for me to skip multiple days.

SO I need your help. Should I just keep pushing though running everyday? Or should I run one day then walk the next? I only have 30 minutes int eh morning to work out so walking seems like a waste of a work out when I can burn more calories running intervals? Or I guess I could just running many short intervals on my off program days.

I dunno someone please help! I need your opinions! BTW I have 50 followers as of today someone has got to have an experience that might help me!

Good day so far

As you can see from my Nike+ mini I got up early today and went for my run before work. It really helps me feel good about my day but man I have been hungry! I definitely felt more energized and got my water in easily. So I will try it again tomorrow and hopefully it sticks. It was pretty convenient that Amy's Challenge this week was to get up early and work out.

Food was decent today however as we speak a pizza is being delivered! Its ok it is thin crust cheese pizza from a new place down the block. We have ordered from them 2 times so far and the pizza is really interesting there is actual tomato in the sauce, light amount of cheese, and the crust isn't greasy at all. It seems pretty healthy as far as pizza goes. It is a small buisiness so there is no nutritional information available yet.

All in all a good day so far.

Seeing stupid before it happens

So my birthday is in August and I have planned a pretty decent get together at a restaurant and we are drinking and dancing. It should be a whole lot of fun. My friend is also moving back home too. I was just thinking about that week and had such a stupid thought.

Are you ready for this? I thought "well that is a week lost" meaning that I wasn't even going to try to stay on track how effed up is that? In reality I just need to work out and use my weeklies. I need to be careful of my diet the rest of the week to make up for the dinners out and the margaritas. Isn't that the whole point of ww? Live your life and still lose weight.

I do realize that my party is Saturday night and my weigh in is Sunday so a loss might not happen with all the salty food but thats ok Maybe I will even weigh in a day early so that the sodium doesn't effect the scale. Either way I can handle this.

1lbs down and setting goal

SO I weighed in this morning 1lb down which is super sweet. I am happy with that for sure. I also set my goal for weight watchers (online) and decided that I was going to set a goal weight that I would be happy at not necessarily with in the ranges they set. I decided on 135 for my goal. WW says I need to be 132 for a healthy BMI but I like 135 better, 132 seems odd.

I think that it is a weight that I would be happy with but it isn't my true dream weight. If I could really pick any number that sounds ideal it would be in the 120's but it is not a necessity. I have always thought that the 120's were impossible to reach, maybe this shows that I still do. I do not want to hate myself because I cannot get to 129 when getting to the 130's is incredibly impressive to me. SO that all being said I plan on 135 but I will reevaluate when I get there.

Right now as I lose the bulk of my weight the number is important to me it makes me feel like I am making progress. The closer that I get to the goal I am sure I will rely on it less and rely on how I feel more. That is simply where I am right now and I am ok with it.

July Workout calendar

Here is my work out calendar for July not as good as June but still pretty impressive for me. R=running, S= Shredding, swim=swimming and W=walking

Note to self...

Watching Man vs Food is not helpful when all the foods on the show are a bazillion calories and look delicious.


That being said as much as I want to hit the local diner asap instead I said to the husband "we should hit the grocery store and make burgers for dinner" How is that for progress? I am proud.

Out of..

weekly points so I better stay within my points tomorrow!! I don't want to use my measly 6 activity points from this week.

WW Natzi for a week

I think I need to go into the role of the WW Nazi for a week. What does that mean..you may ask... Well it means

• measure everything
• meet daily requirements
  
• drink 95% water 5% diet coke as opposed to the other way around
• plan out meals
• get 5+ days of activity (preferably in the am and pm)
• blog daily (like that's a problem)
• journal everything
• Eat breakfast
  
• no eating out
• Start the week with a clean house (this helps I swear)

I have to say that most of these I do regularly anyways but next week I will put them all together. Measuring is a pain, I am pretty good at eyeballing I usually only measure things like butter and cereal but I am talking about measuring EVERYTHING. I will have to dust off my food scale!

I have started cleaning the house and boy I have a lot of work ahead of me tomorrow. I want a clean clutter free house. One room down, 3 to go. I love a clean house..

I would take pics of my food but man that is a pain in the butt. I will think about that one. I guess we will see what happens! I am hoping this will be the push I need to get this weight loss moving. Hopefully I will also start the week off with a loss Sunday morning!

ok

I think I may have mentioned this before....

I was thinking today of some advice my husband gave me a few months ago. I was feeling crappy thinking about quitting weight watchers again because I wasn't really losing anything. The honest truth was probably that I was eye balling servings and giving up midweek, which can mess with your mind. You think that you are doing well but really you are discounting how many points are really in the foods you are eating, especially when you go out.

So back to the advice, my husband basically said....Why quit? You will just gain back what you lost and end up rejoining again... probably sounds harsh but he didn't say it that way. He was calling me out on a behavior pattern that I have been playing over and over the past 4 years. He is right, that is exactly what would have happened. I'm glad I listened.

I may not be dropping pounds like I want to but at least I am moving in the right direction. I really do wish I could drop 2 or 3lbs a week like other people do but it doesn't work for me that way. I am so lucky if I lose 1. It sucks and it is tough but being sad about it isn't going to make my body work differently. I have to take what I can get and push forward. It is the only way I will be able to meet my goal.

Thank you to every single one of my followers and to every blog that I follow. I know I may not be much of a role model but I appreciate your support and information. You guys keep me going.

I have been kicking around the same 10lbs for years and I am done with them. Go AWAY! I don't want you anymore! No more fooling around I mean business. I am just barely in the 170s and I will not go back to the 180s. 180 something I am done with you! Never again. I am living my life and I want to be healthy and happy. I am going to see 130 something on the scale and maybe 120something. I will. My short term goal is to get into the 140's before my cruise in February but I will be happy if I get into the 150's and hey 160 something is progress too.

So this is how I am feeling right now. It's craziness in my head but I am doing ok.

Lowered points..

Wow I really hope that lowering my points this week pays off! (don't worry it is the recommended amount for the 170s) I just hope it works because I have been struggling with it a little, I am however using my weekly allowance to cover my overages. I haven't been using them to splurge but rather to just get by. And I think that is it good. I always enjoyed splurging but in the end it left me feeling like I wasted my points. It is usually going out to eat and having something really really good but really really bad on points.

It feels so much more controlled to use my weeklies over the course of the week as needed. I actually don't like eating out most of the time because most foods are so unnecessarily unhealthy in restaurants. I would rather make those foods at home and modify them but even just making them as they are in the restaurant (full fat cheese, white bread etc) and it is healthier than the restaurant version. Restaurants actually scare me now that I have seen the nutritional info on them. What a waste! Some restaurants make McD's look good!! SCARY!

Ok I am done my restaurant rant, I guess my overall point is that I better lose something this week!! : P

Check in.

Hey guys, it is still super hot here in Maine, wow! I can do cold, I love warm, but hot sucks with no ac! I ran this morning as planned and boy am I glad I didn't wait!

I actually was running behind and had to push my lunch plans so that I could run! Wait .....yeah I pushed the fun stuff to get the exercise thing done. That is such a nice feeling to know that I am really living the healthy lifestyle that I want to.

I am almost wishing I could run again today but there is no way with this heat, I'd probably pass out haha. Why is it that you always want to exercise when you can't?!? I think I will instead sit in front of the fan and veg.

feeling hot hot hot

Wowzer is it hot here and it is killing my running schedule. I gotta break it down I have no ac and it is in the 80's here and really humid. To me that equals no running for me. My eating has been good though and I got in lots of water. I'm not feeling too bad about it.

Tomorrow is my day off so I hope to get a run in in the AM and get it out of the way before it heats up here. I have plans to meet a friend for lunch at a sandwich place not too worried about finding something decently healthy there. It looks like another scortcher tomorrow so maybe I might even hit the beach for a bit to read and hang out. I bet there will be some ice cream in my future!!

Cannot stop

I cannot stop eating! I have tried popcorn, water, diet soda, and peanut butter with pretzels. I am already 10pts over my daily allowance. Crap crap crap. I am really feeling hungry and I shouldn't which is always irritating. I am not craving anything in particular so there is really no fix for this problem. Must stop eating...must stop eating....must....stop...eating

tuck and roll

I have to say I fell off the 30 day shred wagon. I lasted 5 days but it was really hurting my running. I had full intentions of doing the full 30 days but hey that didn't work out. I am hoping that once I get my running down (30 minutes straight) then I can do the 30 days straight.

I am still feeling pretty sick to my stomach from yesterday. I'm not sure what is up with my tummy but it is not feeling very settled. I wanted to run today but I am thinking it might not be a good idea if you catch my drift.

Food is good today I am a little over in points but it was all good stuff. I was really hungry for dinner and so I ate an extra portion. I have also gotten lots of water in today so that is a plus. I did weigh in today and I stayed the same Yay. Sure losing would be better but after a weekend away I will take it.

Tomorow I will get back to running and hopefully a good long walk too.

Home and back to life

Well I am finally home and back to my normal life. I have to say I ate some crap this weekend but overall I don't think I went overboard. My water intake however was terrible, I don't think I drank any from Thursday night on.

I didn't weigh in this morning since I wasn't home and didn't want to take the number from this evening because it would be totally off. I will weigh in tomorrow morning and report that number. I am also back to work tomorrow which will be an adjustment after being away for 11 days. It was nice to have a vacation but I have to say I did not accomplish anything I wanted to. I didn't even get as much activity in as I usually do. Oh well it is what it is.

It is slim pickings for food at our place after being away and payday is not until Thursday. Not good. My plan is to try to just clear out the pantry/freezer and just pick up some fruit to tide us over until payday. Hopefully tomorrows number is good, at least staying the same and not a gain. That would sure help.

I am exhausted so it is off to bed with a movie for me. I cannot wait to get back on track tomorrow.

Away

I am heading out to visit the inlaws and attend my nephew's first birthday. I will be gone until late Sunday. I am looking forward to getting away (they live 4 hours north in the middle of the woods-one horse town type of place) I don't really enjoy the country living but it is nice to be away from the errands, bill paying, and cleaning. I get to relax a little.

The downside they don't have a shower, just a tub. No running for me without a shower. To top it off they are not healthy eaters. They are we work in the woods and need our potatoes and meat and white bread. Not a whole lot of patience for buying (more expensive) health foods. I mean they would support me but not really understand. I usually just try to watch portion control when I am there.

My goal for this weekend is not to lose because that is just not reasonable for me with a weekend away. I am just hoping to stay the same. I know that after this weekend I will want to get back to my healthy eating, I usually miss it.

So since I only got one run with my Nike+ sportband I haven't written a real review on it. I really enjoyed using it but I will have more of an opinion later. Well I am off for now talk to you all in a few days (there is no internet in the woods) have a great weekend!

Yay it came!

My Nike+ sportband that is. I am cleaning my house while it charges(2hours) then I will test it out and give you all a real review!

SO far the cuteness factor is a 9 out of 10. Slick minimal packaging, instructions aren't great but there are online tools. I have already set a small goal on the nikeplus site. The online support seems to be great. Alright on to cleaning.

Grumpy

I'm grumpy today. I didn't run this morning. It is my 2 year wedding anniversary and I am irritated with my husband because he was acting like a jerk last night. Nothing big but I hold grudges, when he puts me in a bad mood it is really hard for me to shake it no matter how much I want to. So, I am grumpy. I want to be happy and celebrate our anniversary but I can't seem to snap out of it.

Not sure what to do. I am heading out to hang with a friend in a little bit I am hoping that it will snap me out of my grump.

BMI calculator tick me off

So I was playing around with the BMI calculator and figured out where I need to be to be considered a normal weight. AS high as 132 and as low as 98lbs. Yeah because a 5ft 1inch woman at 98lbs sounds healthy ..right. I think that sounds crazy! Especially someone with any muscle tone what so ever. It is crazy that my goal weight still leaves me as overweight. I think that 135lbs is a healthy weight for me, way better than 179 but also way better than 98lbs.

Of course I would be lying if I said that 110lbs doesn't sound nice but I really don't see it as a reasonable weight for me . We shall see I suppose but if I feel good at 135ish then that is where I should be even if it makes me classifyed as overweight! SO there!

On a different note you all were right, I waited to shred for my husband to get home and then plans were made for the evening and we ended up staying out until 9pm. Oh well that is life, at least I got my run in!

It's funny..

that I am sitting here tinking about how I need to go for a run and shred. Just sitting here thinking ...thinking....thinking..um where is the doing?! Haah My current excuse is that I just ate lunch and my stomach needs to settle. I totally should have run before I ate. Oh well lesson learned.

The plan is that I cannot go out and run my errands until I run and shower. SO I really need to get this done! I haven't decided whether to shred after my run or to wait until the husband gets home since he hasn't shredded in days.

I guess I just wanted to document my procrastination so I could see it! Its silly really. NIke says it best "Just do it!"

Rest day

I decided to give myself a break today, no running, no shred. I rested and relaxed just enjoying a lazy Sunday. Today was the first day of only 24 daily points I came in at 23 points. Wow that shocked me. I ate well and even had a little ice cream for dessert. When I was eating 27 points I found myself repeatedly going over my points so it is strange that today I came in at 23. Sure I feel like I could snack but I am not hungry at all. I guess it helps that I didn't work out.

Since I am on vacation I am thinking that I should be able to easily get my workouts in tomorrow. Maybe even a little beach time!

Goodbye 180s

Holy cow! I weighed in at 179 this morning! Yay!!! I am out of the 180s!

That being said after I rest my points yesterday to 25, with my new weight I am down to 24pts a day! wow that is a big change from 27 but hey maybe that's why it took so long to lose this pound. I can do 24 pts a day, it is on.

I really needed this loss as you can probably tell from yesterdays posts it was really getting me down being stuck at 180 for 4 weeks. Maybe all my working out will start paying off too!

Anyway I slept in today so I need to go eat some breakfast!

Run and shred 5ish

So I didn't get to my run today until 8:30pm which was a bad idea because I know I am useless at night. But I did it anyway. I also beat my best running time (amount of time running that is) I ran 12 minutes straight!! Now I have strayed a little from the c25k plan lately jsut running some similar intervals. I decided tonight to try something new and run as long as I could bear it. 12 minutes it was amazing. I then walked a bit and ran another couple minutes before my cool down. It is really nice to just push yourself sometimes.

That being said when I went to shred after the run I just didn't have it in me to bop a long with Jillian. I turned her commentary off but it still wasn't happening. I decided to just do the strength move tonight since I had already gotten the cardio in. I am still counting it as a day of shredding though because the basic concept was there. Tomorrow I will start my workouts earlier in the day and get them out of the way.

I will do abs before bed but for now I am off to a nice relaxing bubble bath.

Stop whinning

Ok so after writing that last post I realized that something is not working. I decided to make a list of what I could change. The best answer I came up with is to adjust my daily points. I dropped two points a day down to 25 daily points. I plan to use my weekly points as needed and keep my activity points as bonus to my weight loss. I am really going to focus on not using my weekly points unless I am really hungry most likely due to working out.

Insanity is doing the same thing and expecting a different outcome. Now I have to adjust myself. I also plan on making sure I eat regularly meals and snacks in between.

Tomorrow is my actual weigh in and I want to start my week off right. So in order to do that I am going to get some household chores done today. I am going to clean out my fridge, organize, and fill it back up with fresh produce. I am going to clean my whole apartment. I am going to make a meal plan including breakfasts, lunches, and dinners. I am going to run and shred #5. That should keep me busy! BTW I am on vacation next week YAY!

Debbie downer is confused

I weighed myself this morning to see if I had broken the 180lb mark that I have been stuck at for a month now. Nope. Tomorrow is the official weigh in day and I am not feeling overly hopeful that there will be a change. What the heck. I am following the plan, staying in my points, working out like a fiend, eating healthy foods and there is nothing happening. I really have faith in the program but it is really starting to fade again.

I know my body feels different but my measurements are the same and my clothes fit close to the same. I just don't get it. I really want to focus on health but it feels like I am doing something wrong when there is no change in my weight. I mean no loss in one month, wow. I am only at the beginning of my weight loss, I feel like I should be still losing on a regular basis. I don't ask for much just a pound a week.

Well I guess my only choice is to keep going. Hopefully there is so magical disappearing pound for tomorrow.

Run and Shred #4

This was the toughest run I have had in weeks. I think doing the shred dvd is seriously effecting my running ability. I am not giving up yet though I am hoping that I will be less sore after the next few days of shredding.

Now after my run I moved right in to the shred dvd because I know that if I shred first I am too tired to run after. This combination is really tough but at least I know I have my run done and just 20 minutes of Jillian to go.

Wow Shredding is still hard, I am sweating like crazy. I have found that if I massage my quads after my work out it helps with the soreness. You can use a rolling pin or I use a tortilla roller that someone gave us that has never made a single tortilla in its life.

I have realized how far I have come as far as working out. I don't make as many excuses anymore. I instead come up with plans so that I can get the work out in. I am hoping the fact that I have so much free time this summer will really get me ready for when I don't have much time in the fall. I want this to be who I am, a healthy person who works out because it is a part of her life not just because she wants to lose a few pounds.

Day 3 Shred

Ok I really didn't want to or even think I would make it to shred today. My quads are killing me but I decided that I needed to. I said that I would shred unless there was abig reason not to. Feeling sore is not a reason skip the workout. I will probably never say " I want to shred, its basically torture. BUT I did it today and I will do it tomorrow then the next day and so on and so on. I will put my all into this 30 day challenge, that I promise.

Food was good today, decided to have a rest day from running since the shred wore me out. Tomorrow I will run in the morning and shred in the afternoon. The evening will be spent at a local festival, I totally have enough points for a doughboy (funnel cake) but I think I will probably pass. We shall see I have worked hard this week and I will enjoy myself tomorrow knowing that I have the choice to have anything (one type of anything :P )My bet will probably be fries!

Ok off to shower then watching Bones.

By the way

At what point in my life did getting a running watch become the #1 item on my birthday gift list? Haha I am so excited about getting it that I feel ridiculous but good. I cannot believe I spent the money on it either, wow!

Also just so you know it is actually a gift from my husband but he didn't want to order the wrong thing so he told me to order what I wanted haaha. But he was the one who suggested I get one. I had thought about it but never mentioned it to him. SO when he said that he had read about it and thought I might like it I knew I should have one.

It makes me feel so good to know that he believes in me, that I can be a runner. I have the most supportive husband ever no matter how many times I try and fail he still cheers me on with each new plan. I am a lucky girl.

Early birthday Present

Look what I am ordering myself for an early birthday present!
It is a Nike+ Sportband so that I can document my runs.


Of course in Pink! Click here for more info on my new toy!

I am going to order it today along with a sensor pouch that attaches to my non nike+ sneakers. Yay for gifts that promote wellness! I cannot wait to get it. The new improved model just came out 2 days ago and I cannot find it in stores yet so I am going to order it from Nike.com This is going to really help me transition to outside running, which is a real goal of mine.

Sore

Wow I woke up so sore this morning. It hurts to walk, stand, do stairs, dear lord. I have to do it again in the next 8 hours. Jillian sure did shred my butt!

Day 2 Shred

Its not gonna get easier is it? haha. Today I decided to be clever and go for my run then do the Shed. Actually I don't think that the running helped or hurt my shred progress. It was still really tough of course and I don't think I have EVER sweat this much, not even my first week of running. I cannot stress enough how great it is to do a workout DVD with simple basic moves. I really like that I know what is going on and that it is only 3 minutes of strength, 2 minutes of cardio, and 1 minute of abs rinse and repeat twice.

My biggest ache is in the front of my thighs which sucks because it makes stairs brutal. It also makes me happy because it shows that those are muscles that I am missing durring my runs that are getting a work out. I think that the 5lb weights I am using are too heavy for some of the moves so I used water bottles today. I think I will pick up some 3lb weights soon.

I think my biggest complaint with this DVD is that the cool down is really insufficiant. The stretching is done too quickly. I understand that it is a selling point that the routine is short but adding 5 or so more minutes would really probably help with the soreness. Now that I know that I am adding my own cool down at the end and extending the stretches that Jillian does.

Finally, I do have to say I am really proud of myself. I got invited to a BBQ this morning so I knew that i would be out for the evening so When I was lucky to get a long lunch break allowing me to run and do the Shred. It would have been a good excuse skip the Shred but I didnt. I wanted to really give this my best try to make through the entire 30 days. That being said, No I won't be doing this 30 days straight. I am going away next weekend to visit my inlaws, there is no way that I am sweating my butt off in their living room haha. I do plan on packing my running shoes and I promise I will do some push ups and sit ups in Jillian's honor.

Day one SHRED

Dear Jillian,
I love you dearly but your 30 day Shred Dvd kicked my ass. It practically brought my husband to tears which made me laugh hysterically which in turn made me miss about 15% of the work out. Giggling works abs muscles though, right? Anyways I enjoy your challenges and appreciate you apologies because you really do seem to understand that you are causing pain. I do believe that in the end of the 30 days I will see results and I like that. No phoning your workouts in, right Jill? Ok so I still love you and you hot little body which helps me visualize the reason why I am killing myself. Take care and I will see you tomorrow if I can move.

Yours Truely,
Jess

PS. -IT IS ON.

30 day shred is here

So my DVD came today and I browsed through it quickly on my computer to see what I was in for. I have to say it looks pretty simple (the moves) which I really like but also that it will kick my butt. I am going to attempt the 30 days of shredding and I am planning on blogging about how each day effects me. I shouldn't say attempt because it implies an out but really I am going to put all I have into sticking with it for the 30 days. I am also planning in taking before and after pics of both myself and my husband(who will never do the whole 30 days!) so that will be interesting. I hate how the cover of the dvd says lose up to 20lbs in 30 days because it just makes it seems so gimmicky. My goal is to lose 10 in the 30 days. Heres hoping.

In other news I am on my lunch break and I came home for a run, LOVE days like this when I can get my run in mid day. Now I am off back to work, have a great day!

Quick quick

food is good, water is great, and got my run in. I was down the pound that I was up on weigh in day, hopefully another will follow it this week.

diet coke is back

I lasted 2 days without diet coke..haa I made the husband pick some up for me today! I just wanted it so bad...I was actually snacking in the place of the diet coke. SO I think I will keep it around for a while longer. I do however plan to cut down to no more than 2 cans a day.

I am feeling a little better this evening about the gain this morning. I think the worst part was emailing Amy and telling her that I gained. Not a great start for the challenge but underneath it all I know I have been making good choices. I mean I have never stuck to an exercise program as long as I have this time with running. I am determined to be a runner. I know my body is changing for the better I can feel it. I feel stronger and leaner. My measurements have changed only slightly but I will take what I can get.

Today starts a new week and I am ready for it.