Out of..

weekly points so I better stay within my points tomorrow!! I don't want to use my measly 6 activity points from this week.

WW Natzi for a week

I think I need to go into the role of the WW Nazi for a week. What does that mean..you may ask... Well it means

• measure everything
• meet daily requirements
  
• drink 95% water 5% diet coke as opposed to the other way around
• plan out meals
• get 5+ days of activity (preferably in the am and pm)
• blog daily (like that's a problem)
• journal everything
• Eat breakfast
  
• no eating out
• Start the week with a clean house (this helps I swear)

I have to say that most of these I do regularly anyways but next week I will put them all together. Measuring is a pain, I am pretty good at eyeballing I usually only measure things like butter and cereal but I am talking about measuring EVERYTHING. I will have to dust off my food scale!

I have started cleaning the house and boy I have a lot of work ahead of me tomorrow. I want a clean clutter free house. One room down, 3 to go. I love a clean house..

I would take pics of my food but man that is a pain in the butt. I will think about that one. I guess we will see what happens! I am hoping this will be the push I need to get this weight loss moving. Hopefully I will also start the week off with a loss Sunday morning!

ok

I think I may have mentioned this before....

I was thinking today of some advice my husband gave me a few months ago. I was feeling crappy thinking about quitting weight watchers again because I wasn't really losing anything. The honest truth was probably that I was eye balling servings and giving up midweek, which can mess with your mind. You think that you are doing well but really you are discounting how many points are really in the foods you are eating, especially when you go out.

So back to the advice, my husband basically said....Why quit? You will just gain back what you lost and end up rejoining again... probably sounds harsh but he didn't say it that way. He was calling me out on a behavior pattern that I have been playing over and over the past 4 years. He is right, that is exactly what would have happened. I'm glad I listened.

I may not be dropping pounds like I want to but at least I am moving in the right direction. I really do wish I could drop 2 or 3lbs a week like other people do but it doesn't work for me that way. I am so lucky if I lose 1. It sucks and it is tough but being sad about it isn't going to make my body work differently. I have to take what I can get and push forward. It is the only way I will be able to meet my goal.

Thank you to every single one of my followers and to every blog that I follow. I know I may not be much of a role model but I appreciate your support and information. You guys keep me going.

I have been kicking around the same 10lbs for years and I am done with them. Go AWAY! I don't want you anymore! No more fooling around I mean business. I am just barely in the 170s and I will not go back to the 180s. 180 something I am done with you! Never again. I am living my life and I want to be healthy and happy. I am going to see 130 something on the scale and maybe 120something. I will. My short term goal is to get into the 140's before my cruise in February but I will be happy if I get into the 150's and hey 160 something is progress too.

So this is how I am feeling right now. It's craziness in my head but I am doing ok.

Lowered points..

Wow I really hope that lowering my points this week pays off! (don't worry it is the recommended amount for the 170s) I just hope it works because I have been struggling with it a little, I am however using my weekly allowance to cover my overages. I haven't been using them to splurge but rather to just get by. And I think that is it good. I always enjoyed splurging but in the end it left me feeling like I wasted my points. It is usually going out to eat and having something really really good but really really bad on points.

It feels so much more controlled to use my weeklies over the course of the week as needed. I actually don't like eating out most of the time because most foods are so unnecessarily unhealthy in restaurants. I would rather make those foods at home and modify them but even just making them as they are in the restaurant (full fat cheese, white bread etc) and it is healthier than the restaurant version. Restaurants actually scare me now that I have seen the nutritional info on them. What a waste! Some restaurants make McD's look good!! SCARY!

Ok I am done my restaurant rant, I guess my overall point is that I better lose something this week!! : P

Check in.

Hey guys, it is still super hot here in Maine, wow! I can do cold, I love warm, but hot sucks with no ac! I ran this morning as planned and boy am I glad I didn't wait!

I actually was running behind and had to push my lunch plans so that I could run! Wait .....yeah I pushed the fun stuff to get the exercise thing done. That is such a nice feeling to know that I am really living the healthy lifestyle that I want to.

I am almost wishing I could run again today but there is no way with this heat, I'd probably pass out haha. Why is it that you always want to exercise when you can't?!? I think I will instead sit in front of the fan and veg.

feeling hot hot hot

Wowzer is it hot here and it is killing my running schedule. I gotta break it down I have no ac and it is in the 80's here and really humid. To me that equals no running for me. My eating has been good though and I got in lots of water. I'm not feeling too bad about it.

Tomorrow is my day off so I hope to get a run in in the AM and get it out of the way before it heats up here. I have plans to meet a friend for lunch at a sandwich place not too worried about finding something decently healthy there. It looks like another scortcher tomorrow so maybe I might even hit the beach for a bit to read and hang out. I bet there will be some ice cream in my future!!

Cannot stop

I cannot stop eating! I have tried popcorn, water, diet soda, and peanut butter with pretzels. I am already 10pts over my daily allowance. Crap crap crap. I am really feeling hungry and I shouldn't which is always irritating. I am not craving anything in particular so there is really no fix for this problem. Must stop eating...must stop eating....must....stop...eating

tuck and roll

I have to say I fell off the 30 day shred wagon. I lasted 5 days but it was really hurting my running. I had full intentions of doing the full 30 days but hey that didn't work out. I am hoping that once I get my running down (30 minutes straight) then I can do the 30 days straight.

I am still feeling pretty sick to my stomach from yesterday. I'm not sure what is up with my tummy but it is not feeling very settled. I wanted to run today but I am thinking it might not be a good idea if you catch my drift.

Food is good today I am a little over in points but it was all good stuff. I was really hungry for dinner and so I ate an extra portion. I have also gotten lots of water in today so that is a plus. I did weigh in today and I stayed the same Yay. Sure losing would be better but after a weekend away I will take it.

Tomorow I will get back to running and hopefully a good long walk too.

Home and back to life

Well I am finally home and back to my normal life. I have to say I ate some crap this weekend but overall I don't think I went overboard. My water intake however was terrible, I don't think I drank any from Thursday night on.

I didn't weigh in this morning since I wasn't home and didn't want to take the number from this evening because it would be totally off. I will weigh in tomorrow morning and report that number. I am also back to work tomorrow which will be an adjustment after being away for 11 days. It was nice to have a vacation but I have to say I did not accomplish anything I wanted to. I didn't even get as much activity in as I usually do. Oh well it is what it is.

It is slim pickings for food at our place after being away and payday is not until Thursday. Not good. My plan is to try to just clear out the pantry/freezer and just pick up some fruit to tide us over until payday. Hopefully tomorrows number is good, at least staying the same and not a gain. That would sure help.

I am exhausted so it is off to bed with a movie for me. I cannot wait to get back on track tomorrow.

Away

I am heading out to visit the inlaws and attend my nephew's first birthday. I will be gone until late Sunday. I am looking forward to getting away (they live 4 hours north in the middle of the woods-one horse town type of place) I don't really enjoy the country living but it is nice to be away from the errands, bill paying, and cleaning. I get to relax a little.

The downside they don't have a shower, just a tub. No running for me without a shower. To top it off they are not healthy eaters. They are we work in the woods and need our potatoes and meat and white bread. Not a whole lot of patience for buying (more expensive) health foods. I mean they would support me but not really understand. I usually just try to watch portion control when I am there.

My goal for this weekend is not to lose because that is just not reasonable for me with a weekend away. I am just hoping to stay the same. I know that after this weekend I will want to get back to my healthy eating, I usually miss it.

So since I only got one run with my Nike+ sportband I haven't written a real review on it. I really enjoyed using it but I will have more of an opinion later. Well I am off for now talk to you all in a few days (there is no internet in the woods) have a great weekend!

Yay it came!

My Nike+ sportband that is. I am cleaning my house while it charges(2hours) then I will test it out and give you all a real review!

SO far the cuteness factor is a 9 out of 10. Slick minimal packaging, instructions aren't great but there are online tools. I have already set a small goal on the nikeplus site. The online support seems to be great. Alright on to cleaning.

Grumpy

I'm grumpy today. I didn't run this morning. It is my 2 year wedding anniversary and I am irritated with my husband because he was acting like a jerk last night. Nothing big but I hold grudges, when he puts me in a bad mood it is really hard for me to shake it no matter how much I want to. So, I am grumpy. I want to be happy and celebrate our anniversary but I can't seem to snap out of it.

Not sure what to do. I am heading out to hang with a friend in a little bit I am hoping that it will snap me out of my grump.

BMI calculator tick me off

So I was playing around with the BMI calculator and figured out where I need to be to be considered a normal weight. AS high as 132 and as low as 98lbs. Yeah because a 5ft 1inch woman at 98lbs sounds healthy ..right. I think that sounds crazy! Especially someone with any muscle tone what so ever. It is crazy that my goal weight still leaves me as overweight. I think that 135lbs is a healthy weight for me, way better than 179 but also way better than 98lbs.

Of course I would be lying if I said that 110lbs doesn't sound nice but I really don't see it as a reasonable weight for me . We shall see I suppose but if I feel good at 135ish then that is where I should be even if it makes me classifyed as overweight! SO there!

On a different note you all were right, I waited to shred for my husband to get home and then plans were made for the evening and we ended up staying out until 9pm. Oh well that is life, at least I got my run in!

It's funny..

that I am sitting here tinking about how I need to go for a run and shred. Just sitting here thinking ...thinking....thinking..um where is the doing?! Haah My current excuse is that I just ate lunch and my stomach needs to settle. I totally should have run before I ate. Oh well lesson learned.

The plan is that I cannot go out and run my errands until I run and shower. SO I really need to get this done! I haven't decided whether to shred after my run or to wait until the husband gets home since he hasn't shredded in days.

I guess I just wanted to document my procrastination so I could see it! Its silly really. NIke says it best "Just do it!"

Rest day

I decided to give myself a break today, no running, no shred. I rested and relaxed just enjoying a lazy Sunday. Today was the first day of only 24 daily points I came in at 23 points. Wow that shocked me. I ate well and even had a little ice cream for dessert. When I was eating 27 points I found myself repeatedly going over my points so it is strange that today I came in at 23. Sure I feel like I could snack but I am not hungry at all. I guess it helps that I didn't work out.

Since I am on vacation I am thinking that I should be able to easily get my workouts in tomorrow. Maybe even a little beach time!

Goodbye 180s

Holy cow! I weighed in at 179 this morning! Yay!!! I am out of the 180s!

That being said after I rest my points yesterday to 25, with my new weight I am down to 24pts a day! wow that is a big change from 27 but hey maybe that's why it took so long to lose this pound. I can do 24 pts a day, it is on.

I really needed this loss as you can probably tell from yesterdays posts it was really getting me down being stuck at 180 for 4 weeks. Maybe all my working out will start paying off too!

Anyway I slept in today so I need to go eat some breakfast!

Run and shred 5ish

So I didn't get to my run today until 8:30pm which was a bad idea because I know I am useless at night. But I did it anyway. I also beat my best running time (amount of time running that is) I ran 12 minutes straight!! Now I have strayed a little from the c25k plan lately jsut running some similar intervals. I decided tonight to try something new and run as long as I could bear it. 12 minutes it was amazing. I then walked a bit and ran another couple minutes before my cool down. It is really nice to just push yourself sometimes.

That being said when I went to shred after the run I just didn't have it in me to bop a long with Jillian. I turned her commentary off but it still wasn't happening. I decided to just do the strength move tonight since I had already gotten the cardio in. I am still counting it as a day of shredding though because the basic concept was there. Tomorrow I will start my workouts earlier in the day and get them out of the way.

I will do abs before bed but for now I am off to a nice relaxing bubble bath.

Stop whinning

Ok so after writing that last post I realized that something is not working. I decided to make a list of what I could change. The best answer I came up with is to adjust my daily points. I dropped two points a day down to 25 daily points. I plan to use my weekly points as needed and keep my activity points as bonus to my weight loss. I am really going to focus on not using my weekly points unless I am really hungry most likely due to working out.

Insanity is doing the same thing and expecting a different outcome. Now I have to adjust myself. I also plan on making sure I eat regularly meals and snacks in between.

Tomorrow is my actual weigh in and I want to start my week off right. So in order to do that I am going to get some household chores done today. I am going to clean out my fridge, organize, and fill it back up with fresh produce. I am going to clean my whole apartment. I am going to make a meal plan including breakfasts, lunches, and dinners. I am going to run and shred #5. That should keep me busy! BTW I am on vacation next week YAY!

Debbie downer is confused

I weighed myself this morning to see if I had broken the 180lb mark that I have been stuck at for a month now. Nope. Tomorrow is the official weigh in day and I am not feeling overly hopeful that there will be a change. What the heck. I am following the plan, staying in my points, working out like a fiend, eating healthy foods and there is nothing happening. I really have faith in the program but it is really starting to fade again.

I know my body feels different but my measurements are the same and my clothes fit close to the same. I just don't get it. I really want to focus on health but it feels like I am doing something wrong when there is no change in my weight. I mean no loss in one month, wow. I am only at the beginning of my weight loss, I feel like I should be still losing on a regular basis. I don't ask for much just a pound a week.

Well I guess my only choice is to keep going. Hopefully there is so magical disappearing pound for tomorrow.

Run and Shred #4

This was the toughest run I have had in weeks. I think doing the shred dvd is seriously effecting my running ability. I am not giving up yet though I am hoping that I will be less sore after the next few days of shredding.

Now after my run I moved right in to the shred dvd because I know that if I shred first I am too tired to run after. This combination is really tough but at least I know I have my run done and just 20 minutes of Jillian to go.

Wow Shredding is still hard, I am sweating like crazy. I have found that if I massage my quads after my work out it helps with the soreness. You can use a rolling pin or I use a tortilla roller that someone gave us that has never made a single tortilla in its life.

I have realized how far I have come as far as working out. I don't make as many excuses anymore. I instead come up with plans so that I can get the work out in. I am hoping the fact that I have so much free time this summer will really get me ready for when I don't have much time in the fall. I want this to be who I am, a healthy person who works out because it is a part of her life not just because she wants to lose a few pounds.

Day 3 Shred

Ok I really didn't want to or even think I would make it to shred today. My quads are killing me but I decided that I needed to. I said that I would shred unless there was abig reason not to. Feeling sore is not a reason skip the workout. I will probably never say " I want to shred, its basically torture. BUT I did it today and I will do it tomorrow then the next day and so on and so on. I will put my all into this 30 day challenge, that I promise.

Food was good today, decided to have a rest day from running since the shred wore me out. Tomorrow I will run in the morning and shred in the afternoon. The evening will be spent at a local festival, I totally have enough points for a doughboy (funnel cake) but I think I will probably pass. We shall see I have worked hard this week and I will enjoy myself tomorrow knowing that I have the choice to have anything (one type of anything :P )My bet will probably be fries!

Ok off to shower then watching Bones.

By the way

At what point in my life did getting a running watch become the #1 item on my birthday gift list? Haha I am so excited about getting it that I feel ridiculous but good. I cannot believe I spent the money on it either, wow!

Also just so you know it is actually a gift from my husband but he didn't want to order the wrong thing so he told me to order what I wanted haaha. But he was the one who suggested I get one. I had thought about it but never mentioned it to him. SO when he said that he had read about it and thought I might like it I knew I should have one.

It makes me feel so good to know that he believes in me, that I can be a runner. I have the most supportive husband ever no matter how many times I try and fail he still cheers me on with each new plan. I am a lucky girl.

Early birthday Present

Look what I am ordering myself for an early birthday present!
It is a Nike+ Sportband so that I can document my runs.


Of course in Pink! Click here for more info on my new toy!

I am going to order it today along with a sensor pouch that attaches to my non nike+ sneakers. Yay for gifts that promote wellness! I cannot wait to get it. The new improved model just came out 2 days ago and I cannot find it in stores yet so I am going to order it from Nike.com This is going to really help me transition to outside running, which is a real goal of mine.

Sore

Wow I woke up so sore this morning. It hurts to walk, stand, do stairs, dear lord. I have to do it again in the next 8 hours. Jillian sure did shred my butt!

Day 2 Shred

Its not gonna get easier is it? haha. Today I decided to be clever and go for my run then do the Shed. Actually I don't think that the running helped or hurt my shred progress. It was still really tough of course and I don't think I have EVER sweat this much, not even my first week of running. I cannot stress enough how great it is to do a workout DVD with simple basic moves. I really like that I know what is going on and that it is only 3 minutes of strength, 2 minutes of cardio, and 1 minute of abs rinse and repeat twice.

My biggest ache is in the front of my thighs which sucks because it makes stairs brutal. It also makes me happy because it shows that those are muscles that I am missing durring my runs that are getting a work out. I think that the 5lb weights I am using are too heavy for some of the moves so I used water bottles today. I think I will pick up some 3lb weights soon.

I think my biggest complaint with this DVD is that the cool down is really insufficiant. The stretching is done too quickly. I understand that it is a selling point that the routine is short but adding 5 or so more minutes would really probably help with the soreness. Now that I know that I am adding my own cool down at the end and extending the stretches that Jillian does.

Finally, I do have to say I am really proud of myself. I got invited to a BBQ this morning so I knew that i would be out for the evening so When I was lucky to get a long lunch break allowing me to run and do the Shred. It would have been a good excuse skip the Shred but I didnt. I wanted to really give this my best try to make through the entire 30 days. That being said, No I won't be doing this 30 days straight. I am going away next weekend to visit my inlaws, there is no way that I am sweating my butt off in their living room haha. I do plan on packing my running shoes and I promise I will do some push ups and sit ups in Jillian's honor.

Day one SHRED

Dear Jillian,
I love you dearly but your 30 day Shred Dvd kicked my ass. It practically brought my husband to tears which made me laugh hysterically which in turn made me miss about 15% of the work out. Giggling works abs muscles though, right? Anyways I enjoy your challenges and appreciate you apologies because you really do seem to understand that you are causing pain. I do believe that in the end of the 30 days I will see results and I like that. No phoning your workouts in, right Jill? Ok so I still love you and you hot little body which helps me visualize the reason why I am killing myself. Take care and I will see you tomorrow if I can move.

Yours Truely,
Jess

PS. -IT IS ON.

30 day shred is here

So my DVD came today and I browsed through it quickly on my computer to see what I was in for. I have to say it looks pretty simple (the moves) which I really like but also that it will kick my butt. I am going to attempt the 30 days of shredding and I am planning on blogging about how each day effects me. I shouldn't say attempt because it implies an out but really I am going to put all I have into sticking with it for the 30 days. I am also planning in taking before and after pics of both myself and my husband(who will never do the whole 30 days!) so that will be interesting. I hate how the cover of the dvd says lose up to 20lbs in 30 days because it just makes it seems so gimmicky. My goal is to lose 10 in the 30 days. Heres hoping.

In other news I am on my lunch break and I came home for a run, LOVE days like this when I can get my run in mid day. Now I am off back to work, have a great day!

Quick quick

food is good, water is great, and got my run in. I was down the pound that I was up on weigh in day, hopefully another will follow it this week.

diet coke is back

I lasted 2 days without diet coke..haa I made the husband pick some up for me today! I just wanted it so bad...I was actually snacking in the place of the diet coke. SO I think I will keep it around for a while longer. I do however plan to cut down to no more than 2 cans a day.

I am feeling a little better this evening about the gain this morning. I think the worst part was emailing Amy and telling her that I gained. Not a great start for the challenge but underneath it all I know I have been making good choices. I mean I have never stuck to an exercise program as long as I have this time with running. I am determined to be a runner. I know my body is changing for the better I can feel it. I feel stronger and leaner. My measurements have changed only slightly but I will take what I can get.

Today starts a new week and I am ready for it.

BUST

I ate all of my points this week, daily, activity, and activity. I gained 1 lb. I am a little bummed, actually I am more than a little bummed. I didn't want to eat all my points but I thought it would help me lose.

I know that I am building muscle from running but geez I have so much fat to lose that you would think I would lose some weight too. I am going to go back to not eating all my points. I wonder about trying to count calories for a week and not counting points. I dunno what I am going to do. I guess firstly I am going to go eat breakfast.

Just Say NO.

So I made the point of NOT picking up diet coke today. I went to several stores and even had the husband ask if I needed it. I said "no, I'm going off diet coke for a while". Ok lets examine that statement....sounds like I am going off a pill/drug doesn't it? Yeah I am going to try to level out ....

Pretty sad actually. So I picked up a 24 pack of water instead. I think it is a good move for a little while trying to get my water intake up and it is that much less chemicals for my body to deal with.

Diet coke will probably be more limited to a treat like when we go out to eat. Its a good thing..I think.

Yadda yadda

So it is a giant FAIL on the not weighing myself daily goal. I just can't seem to stop especially since I am still stuck at 180. Why can't I just drop into the 170's!?! This has been a rather funky week with it being my tom, eating all my points (ALL activity, weekly, and daily), and the ice cream incidents. I have stayed within my points but so far no loss.

I'm not sure how I feel about eating all my points, it feels a little forced. I mean sure I like the idea of being able to eat more but I also want to listen to my body. SO if I eat some ice cream in the evening even though I am not hungry it is like sending mixed messages! I dunno I am feeling a little perplexed today. I guess I will make the call on Sunday after my official weigh in.

As for today I am off from work and my plans are pretty open. I do want to get in another run today and possibly do some cleaning.

30 day Shred

I was browsing fitness dvds looking for something that might interest the husband and get him moving. He is the kind of guy who loses weight easily but doesn't want to work out. I really worry about his cardiovascular health so I have been trying to get him moving.

The 30 day Shred was on sale for $6.99 with $3 shipping so not bad at all. I figured it wasn't a girlie stepish dancing dvd so he might actually do it. I told him about it and he said he would do it. SO the plan is to do the dvd together every night for 30 days, hopefully we can stick to it.

I am just hoping that is doesn't affect my running abilities. I would hate to not be able to run becasue of my legs being sore. anyone tried the shred while doing the c25k? Did it slow you down?

Week 4

Holy COW! I really didn't want to run today. I mean I wanted to but my body was telling me it was too tired. Now usually if I would take a rest day but I took on yesterday and I needed to get the activity in. I think it had a lot to do with the new intervals. 3 minutes are ok but the 5 are tough. Really tough but doable. It definitely pushes me out of my comfort zone BIG time.

I kinda love and hate it. More love than hate though I think but of course I am writing this post run so I may be partial! PS I love posting my status on facebook as "on a run" or "running Crazy" It is another great way to be more motivated! It is amazing how much people will "like" a running status! haha.

Ok off to shower, got some cleaning done and my run out of the way ...now how to spend a lovely sunny afternoon!!?

RAIN!!

Rain is becoming a four letter word for me. I cannot take any more rain! This month it has rained almost EVERY day. It is ridiculous. It is bringing me down big time.

Eating was within points range but not good health wise. It seems all the advice that said make sure you eat all your points including my activity points got somehow misconstrued in my mind to mean Eat, Eat junk, skip on the good stuff, eat ice cream by the pint AS LONG AS you are within your points. I think I need to rearrange my thinking.

The problem is that I have a hard time getting in all those points without eating some junk. I am going to have to work through my eating plan, figure out how to make this all work out. I guess I always figured that as long as I was eating my daily points in healthy foods and eating often throughout the day that I would be ok. I can't seem to wrap my mind around the idea of needing to eat more when I am feeling pretty satisfied.

Ahhh why is it so hard for me to be a loser! : P

Wk4

So I ran Week 4 of c25k today in addition to my week 3 run at lunch. I feel pretty good about it. Week 4 is definitely a push on the last 5 minute run but I did it! I really like that it pushed me out of my comfort zone. Sure 3 minutes isn't easy for me but I can do it but 5 minutes...wow it was tough and I think I liked it. I cannot wait until I can run 30 minutes straight! I am really starting to feel like a runner!

Ok day

Today has been just ok, nothing great. My eating was fine a little on the high points side but mostly because I ate often. I had a ton of water and a couple diet cokes.

I ran on my lunch break and I have to say week 3 is kinda lame. In the beginning I expected to repeat some weeks and I did on 1 and 2. Week 3 always intimidated me I had never made it through week 2 however now I think I am going to skip it! It is basically a 90 second interval then a 3 minute with some walking inbetween then the interval is repeated. Considering that last week I ran 4 3 minute intervals week 3 seems to be back tracking. SO I deleted it off the ipod and I am pressing on to week 4 which consisted of 3 and 5 minute intervals.

So that means I have already met one of this weeks goals YAY!

On a more somber note I weighed my self this morning only to see a gain of 1.5ish pounds. That sucks hoepfully it will disapear when my period goes away. I am hiding my scale tonight.

Weekly Goals

Ok so here are my weekly goals.

1. Drink more water!! Less Diet Coke!
2. Keep running and be ready to move on to wk 4 of c25k
3. Hide the scale until weigh in day Sunday.


Also I want to shout out to all the people who follow my blog, YOU make me so proud! Thank you for investing your time in reading my blog and supporting me!


EDIT
Well I feel a lot better now that I am done with my run. I feel refreshed and ready to take on my week. I guess I didn't realize how much running helped me feel positive about my healthy choices.

BAAAAD IDEA!

So today was one big oops so far. Long story short I went over my daily points by 20 due to a pint of Ben and Jerrys. It sucks but I just wanted it so bad. After having a week with no loss and the only explanation being that I didn't eat enough I made sure that won't happen this week after today.

Well I am not going to let this snowball any further. Having my period is so not an excuse. I ate for comfort for sure and now I have to get a little uncomfortable and work it off. I will run today and try to get it together.

I like the idea that I am not losing because I am forming new muscle and because muscle holds water. I am going to put my scale away and not weigh myself until Sunday. I am going to except that the number on the scale isn't the whole truth. I look better and feel better. My clothes don't seem to fit all that differently but it will come with time.

I will meet my goal for my cruise as long as I keep on moving forward. At first my goal was to hit the 140s by losing 40ish pounds which I still want to move towards but the underlying point wasn't about a number. The true point is that I want to go on my vacation and feel comfortable in my body. I want to do all the activities that I would be too embarrassed to do now at this size. I want a real vacation!!

So onward and downward!

Ice Cream

So I ended up going on a road trip today, I ate junk on purpose haha. I decided to have a high point day to kick off my week in hopes of tricking my body into calorie burning mode haha. I didn't even want the junk it made me sluggish and sick. I wish I could have planned it better and ate a lot of healthy foods instead of a little junky junk. Oh well lesson learned, I don't do well with junk food.

I did end the day with some delisious ice cream, which I totally enjoyed and even settled my tummy! Oh well onward..

Frustrated

Ok so I weighed in today and guess what happened?? Oh yeah nothing. I am frustrated because I am doing everything right! I workout multiple times a week running, I journaled all my eating, I ate almost all my weekly points, and I didn't eat out. I haven't been hungry because I eat when I need to and I have been eating really balanced. I have been eating breakfast and drinking enough water.

As frustrating as this is I am not having that usual feeling of wanting to give up. I can't give up because there is nothing to give up, this is how I am living. I am really focused to becoming a healthy person. I don't feel like I am on a diet but rather that this is my diet. Diet is what you eat not a way to eat.

I have never been one to play the blame game, actually it is one of the reasons I don't go to meetings anymore. I can't handle all the people coming up with excuses while waiting to weigh in . "oh I drank a lot of water today" or "my mother in law is staying with us". Sure sometimes its probably true but the bottom line is that excuses don't help you have a smaller number on the scale. That being said I have no idea why I didn't lose this week but I didn't but I probably will next week.

I did wake up this morning with my TOM and that sucked too. I was woken up by cramps, seriously painful ones. What a horrible way to wake up on a sleep in Sunday morning. I am looking forward to lots of running this week to fight cramps.

I met lots of my goals for this week.
1.I didn't eat out at all this week. CHECK
2. I not only went up to 2 minute intervals but then moved up to 3minutes! DOUBLE CHECK
3. Commercial crunches- well a did it a few times but overall probably a half check

Not too shabby over all. I will post this weeks goals later today I really want to put some good thought into them. Also this post is getting wayyyyy too long! Sorry!

Running

It amazes me how quickly you can build up your running times once you get past the two minutes mark. Ever since I pushed myself through 2 minute intervals it seems like I can do anything! I am so ready to push through these up coming c25k weeks at the normal pace! I cannot wait until I am running 5k straight!

not scared

I didn't run yesterday and it didn't scare me. Let me explain, usually if I miss a day I end up missing 20 or never starting again. It is just how I am I am one of those all or nothing people I am either doing it everyday or not at all.

SO yesterday when I was just exhausted from being at work 2 hours earlier than usual I decided to take the night off. I was feeling ok about it though because I have come to the conclusion that this time I am changing my life. This is how I will continue to eat and workout. This is my new life. There is no giving up, but there are rest days.

Serious running progress

So I have been really pushing my running and today I did something that I have NEVER done before... are you ready. I RAN 7 minutes straight! 7 yeah thats right baby. On my last 2 minute interval I threw my tee shirt over the monitor and just ran. When I was just about die I pulled the tee off the monitor and saw I had run 6.5 minutes so I pushed through to 7 minutes.

This has got to be a good sign. I am moving up to all 3 minute intervals which is week 3 of c25k. Yay. Maybe I can really be a runner, maybe I already am.